Oh Carol

Miss CBC

2011-07-02T00:44:00.002+08:00

Back here, I often blogged about how I miss CBC. Yes I still do so much. How I miss CBC... & I thought how nice it would be if my kids grew up in CBC together with my CBC peers' children like Estelle, Zhi Xin etc. So ri nao & lively. Think JX wouldn't be too lonely... He would run around in CBC with other Kor Kors in CBC & would have Uncles (like Noah, Moses, Zhi Yong, Andrew) & Aunties (Krystin, Zhaoshan, Kaiqi etc) to play with him & help me care for him. In our church, I let him watch TV during lunch as other kids are watching too. Unlike a more sociable Meimei who grew up in present church, JX is more lonely in this church. Just saw Yee See pic of CBC little children in her house. It will be so nice if JX grows up with other little children in church too. I guess Mummy Carol hasn't been doing enough to get herself & JX to interact with others. A lonely mother raise up a lonely child. Haha. But it's not that gloomy actually. I try to communicate with a peer in church now & thank God that with the children, it has been much easier to communicate with others in church. Though definitely, I miss out on fellowship & peer sharing & praying because there's no fellowship with sharing & praying in present church. Only 1 peer who's probably a year younger than me. No others already...hmm I miss so many of you. Hardly meet up with you all & so I try to know stuff through FB.

Prudency

2011-06-06T22:37:00.002+08:00

Dear Blog...it's been some time again since I last blogged. Had been doing more updates on FB instead.

Living in Contentment (Part 5?)
I can't really remember the number of posts I had written on Living in Contentment. With the arrival of our old helper since Feb 2011, Mummy Carol felt very thankful. She's such a good helper that our meals are good & cooked with much effort despite simplicity.

Our little family enjoys the luxury of having home cooked meals daily. We hardly eat outside because it saves money to eat at home. Furthermore, our helper cooks well.

I thank God that I've luxury help during this period of time Ah Po & our old helper are here with us. Our helper respesonsible & efficient so I leave the cooking totally to her (unlike the past) so I can spend more time teaching the kids. She's indeed a blessing to our family. Not forgetting Ah Po. I love them both.

I'm still as prudent as ever. Spending mainly on the kids necessities & their food.

My helper shared that it was really tough back home & they ate mainly vege & hardly any meat. I have to learn to thank God that my children has meat, vege, fruits, bread & snacks to eat. I truly hope JX & Meimei would be less fussy & eats everything we have. They should learn to be like me. Last time, I was slightly fussy but now I eat everything. Haha. That explains why I'm still so plump as dieting never works for me. I've started to skip 1000x for 10mins. With the kids, I don't think I've time for outdoor exercises. So for now, just do skipping.

Thank God for the contentment we have & his Providence.

Thank God

2011-04-01T15:59:00.003+08:00

Hello Everyone!!! Apologies for going MIA for 3 months.
I had been on FB more regularly than blogging.
I always wondered how some Stay Home Mummies could
have time to do such wonderful blogs. Haha.

In summary, what has Mummy Carol been doing?
I experienced a very challenging period in the past 3-4months ago
when our dear Aletheia became so fussy with food
that no matter what i cooked, she would turn her head away & refuse to eat.
She would only eat if I made rice balls for her or fed her with my fingers
or played with her all kinds of novelty games.
I tried cooking different stuff as well.
I was disheartened & exasperated & helpless.
Furthermore, she was extra small in size.
I thank God each time she completed her meals after playing all kinds of games with her.
In such situations, we could only pray for her.

Thank God. Thank God! Now, she's eating more easily though I still need to distract her with games. As she's really small in size, I'm trying my best to feed her with Pediasure milk too. Though she's Small in size,
this little Raindrop girl is a very cheerful girl.
She smiles a lot & is affectionate to her toys.

Oh yes! Our old helper, Dian is back to help us!
I'm so thankful & grateful that she's back to help us...
having to leave behind her son who is the same age as Mei Mei.
She's indeed a wonderful HELP to our family especially in looking after Ah Po.
Thank God for her.

Thank God that Jian Xin is a handsome boy!
Yeah...it's really amusing to see people commenting about his good looks
once they see him for the 1st time.
Recognizing that his good looks aren't from his parents,
this is something we should thank God for.
God made JX to look beautiful.
Just like Joseph in the bible, may this little Joseph grow up to be faithful to God
in all circumstances.
Jian Xin is a temperamental boy - he can be volatile.
May God truly help me to be more patient & not to shout at him
so that he would not model something undesirable.
May God help him to communicate his emotions instead to shouting.

What've I been doing lately?
These few days, I'm reading about homeschooling
& is planning how to teach JX.
Actually, I was spending the nights after the kids sleep to watch Korean dramas.
But I think I need to make more efforts into planning the Curriculum
to teach the kids.
People around have been asking why we didn't send JX to school.
They are worried that JX would lose out in social skills & other academic skills.
Our reason in not sending JX to school yet
is because we didn't want him to be influenced negatively at this young age yet
& since his Mummy is at home, I should be teaching him now
(especially in educating JX about God).
So, dear Mummy Carol has to make more efforts in teaching JX.
I refer to various homeschooling websites to learn how to teach JX.
Don't worry folks.
I'm not only teaching JX on Catechism (every Thurs)...
I'm teaching him letters, numbers, shapes, writing, science etc etc.
JX won't lose out...anyway we don't really care if he lose out in this competitive society.
We felt that it's more important for him to know God
& so Mummy is teaching him Alphabets, science etc...so that
he can read God's words in the future & see the beauty that God has created.
I feel so EXCITED in planning a curriculum to teach him!!!
Alright that's all for updates now.

I miss everyone!

2010-12-26T23:04:00.003+08:00

It's been exactly 2 years since I left my old church & how I miss everyone & everything so deeply. When I see pictures in FB, I truly miss everyone & I miss growing old with everyone. In 2 years, so many youths hv grown to be young working adults & so many peers are getting married. We feel so joyous to see one by one getting married.

I guess with my introvert personality plus taking care of 2 active kids, I'm unable to connect well with the present. Yeah it's pretty much Me & the kids after these 2yrs. Guess I fail in my responsibilty as a Preacher's wife. :( Though I'm glad that I managed to make friend with someone who's a year younger than me. She's the only peer I have in church & hopefully I'll get to know her better. JX still sticks to me & cries Mummy Mummy whenever I'm out of sight for a while. I guess nobody else in church is able to engage him like I do so I play with him, read to him etc so that he won't interrupt service etc. As for Mei Mei, many Aunties would like to carry her afterall she's a YKPC baby. But lately, she's shy or have separation anxiety so at times she doesn't want others to carry. She's a pretty serious baby in church unlike her bubbly self at home. Yeah I really need step out of my comfort zone to break into cliques within church. May God help me.

I really do miss everyone. Yeah it's rather sad that I won't be able to accompany many of you as you get married & have kids growing up in church. Like his Mummy, I feel JX is rather alone in church. The older kids won't want to play with him perhaps because JX might interrupt them at times & might get temperamental at times. Hmm. Hope as he gets older, they'll want to play with him. It's so nice that many of you will hv kids & can support one another in church.

Well... I guess being in a Preacher's family might hv it's loneliness at times. But still, thank God that He is with us all the time.

Signing off here...by Me who misses the past.

Sleepless nights

2010-11-30T04:24:00.003+08:00

Dear old blog, yeah guess I've been too occupied that I've not been updating my new blog either. Yeah Sam is on reservist while I take care of the kids. But I'm down with Flu so my nose doesn't feel good. ;) I just did my QT... I ought to remember to do my QT earlier instead of FB & other stuff.

Contentment in Simplicity Part 4
My life is simple right now & guess if someone is in my position (& does not find joy & contentment in God), she will probably be complaining. May God help me not to complain.

Lately, we are into Scrimp & Save lots & at times buying poultry & groceries can become tedious. Eating chicken for consecutive days, eating whatever the helper cooks, eating mostly at Home (even when you dream about yummy food). Haha. But no worries, only Mummy eats certain food that we want to clear in the fridge. Mummy gives JX, Mei Mei & Ah Po fresh poultry & vegetables!

Eating at home helps to save. Besides food, other household stuff do amount to a lot - diapers for Ah Po & Mei Mei etc etc etc. In the past, I do not scrimp & save/budget to such extent But now I do (guess even my MIL doesn't know we scrimp & save lots with the allowance she gives). Sam taught me how to do so. Haha.

Anyway, I lost a kg or 2 BUT readers, I never Diet after giving birth. Diet & not eating are never in my dictionary as I rather eat & look fat fat rather than compromise on the sufficient milk supply I need to feed baby. So, it's really amazing that Mummy Carol always has food to eat despite tight budget. Indeed, God provides sufficiently. Mummy Carol took a longer time to reduce weight in 2nd pregnancy as I gained 23kg. Added that I had not gone back to my pre-pregnancy weight for the 1st pregnancy. So now, need to reduce 5kg to get back to my non pregnant days. Jiayou Carol! Your old clothes are waiting for you.

Mummy leads a prudent life so cannot afford much stuff for the kids. Occasionally, bring JX down to buy his favorite cake with a toy on top or insert $1 to get those toys (it's really ex $1 for a tiny toy but guess kids like the element of surprise/novelty like adults do as well.) If I bring him to Kiddy palace or toy shops, just let him browse & tell him to say "Hi & Bye" to the toys & told him that we'll get presents for his birthday. Thank God that JX doesn't throw a tantrum & he does as he's told.

Nonetheless, thank God that He provides for us! May Mummy learn to give thanks to God daily.

Some updates of the Children
JX is turning 3 in Dec 29. Three months ago, he's fully toilet trained ( don't need diapers at night too). JX has improved much in his coloring. Still have to remind him on how to hold his pencil correctly. Now, he's into drawing. I know some kids write/draw earlier but it's good that JX has started! Hope his fine motor skills would improve leaps & bounds with more practice. Generally, I think he's rather creative (or rather kids are all creative). Hmm. Anyway, he loves building stuff with Lego or tracks. He loves music too & is able to recognize/hum songs/rhythms he heard. We enrolled him to Yamaha music school - A once a week course for toddlers. Hope he will enjoy it! JX do love his sister though he doesn't express much affection towards her though we taught him to pat her head at times. He knows Sister belongs here so when my mother attempts (for fun) to bring Sister home, he will shout "Mummy, bao Mei Mei!" When Mei Mei cries, he will go to her & tell her not to cry & may stroke her head at times.

Little Mei Mei is 14mth old. Very playful & chatty! She is Kai Xin Guo because she makes ppl happy by calling/addressing them. She's a little parrot & mimics whatever you teach her to say. YeYe, Nai Nai, Bye Bye, Night, light, gorilla, elephant uh-oh etc etc etc. She knows the names of many objects as well. Though JX appears to hv more vocab, Mei Mei's diction is much clearer. She's learning really fast! She loves her brother very much! Loves to follow what he does - takes pencil to color/draw like her bro. But she fights (attempts to pull his shirt) with her brother at times when JX takes her stuff while she's playing. When Mummy puts some feng you on tummy & burp, I saw her doing the
same actions in her playpen. Haha she is really endearing.

Good night. Hope some of you still read this old blog.

2010-09-05T23:18:00.003+08:00

Some updates...

Apologies tt I've not been updating my blog for a while. I was rather perplexed in July but I managed to share with some CBC sisters on FB & told them to pray for us. Thank them for prayers. I've been attending church service after letting Aletheia nap in the pouch. JX tags along with me & I keep him occupied with videos from my iPhone. I guess I don't have much of a choice but that's my only measure to keep him quiet for at least 30mins.

I'm happy that I'm able to attend service finally after 1.5years. I was listening to John Piper sermons on my iPhone & had benefitted much from it. But lately had been slacking again. I need to buck up on listening to sermons, reading God's words & pray to God to grant me patience & love.

Miss CBC friends & fellowship so much! The Angel & Mortal game seems so fun! Sigh, I just have to look after the kids in church so that Sam can focus in his ministry. Yeah very much alone. Guess I have not make enough efforts to build relationship with others. I need to learn to be more proactive even when they aren't.

Thank God that Mei Mei just turn 1year old. Yes Mei Mei is small. And I really don't know why. She eats well & sleeps well. To breastfeed her, I ensure I get sufficient nutrition too. God made her that way & that's that. She's small but a healthy & happy girl! Yep for both my kids, always get to hear ppl saying they are small. Sigh. Haha.
JX was a very fat & chubby baby (as fat or even slightly fatter than his baby cousin, Zhi Xin) till he was 12th mth old. And because I was pregant, I was adviced to wean him off. But JX doesn't like formula & he's really active. I've been & trying my best to feed him well. He eats well yet he's so lean. I'll try my best to give him more milk.
Sigh. Sam reminded me what's most important is that they are healthy.

Alright that's all for now.

A Family So Different

2010-06-24T16:05:00.003+08:00

A Family So Different

Hmm I feel being in a 'pastor's' family is rather different from the

normal family?

When others are free on the weekends & holidays,

Pastors are busy as a bee on Sundays

& may be involved in church camps/retreats during holidays.

Haha. So if you noticed, most of my FB pictures are taken from HOME!

Perhaps if I just have one kid, I would have gone 'gai gai' more often.

Perhaps if I could have a lightweight stroller, I would have tried bringing the 2 kids out myself.

Being a Pastor is different -

Perhaps in a normal job, you'll be under scrutiny by your employers, colleagues & clients.

But being a pastor, means that you're under scrutiny by the whole congregation (60 members or even 200 members for CBC).

So imagine having 60-200 members talking about YOU -

the good & the bad things about what you do, things not done enough, not meeting expectations etc. etc.

Haha.

I think if I were a pastor, I would have crumbled if I do not rely on God.

I guess one has to be very thick skinned & Strong Mentally to be a pastor.

Being a Pastor is often stereotyped as having

a volunteer job without getting paid.

Haha. Pastor only need to work on Sundays - just go up & preach lor.

I guess many didn't realize that behind a sermon

goes tons & tons of heavy Reading & Preparation involved.

It's not like our essays/papers that we do in our University days.

Ultimately, pastor's employer is God

so all that they do have to be accountable to Him.

May God continue to grant Pa Pa strength, wisdom & joy in his church ministry.

Dear Readers, do keep Song En's ministry in prayers

& may you all be reminded to pray for your pastors

instead of criticizing them about things that aren't done.

2010-06-10T22:55:00.004+08:00

Time passes swiftly & we've been away from our former church for 2 years. Yet, I fondly miss my good old peers there & serving with youths. When I think about having to attend Sunday classes while having to miss church service in my present church, I recalled how good tt there is a cry room in CBC so that JX can run about while I attend service.

I like the baby Sunday class room that CBC has too - clean, cosy & kids friendly. And I'll have good friends & peers with their babies to fellowship with & pray with. I miss fellowship dearly & do envy all of you who can fellowship in church. Yeah I know envy isn't a good feeling & this is something I should reflect upon.

As I reflect now upon my present ministry which is to support Sam in his ministry that is to look after the kids while Sam serves in church, I feel rather empty at times - spiritual emptiness. Sigh. JX sticks to me like super glue & I've difficulties stepping out of the Sunday class room to attend service. Personally I don't mind him crying at all but I don't think the teacher would be able to manage him. If JX keeps crying, the teacher (only hv 1 teacher to 8 kids) wouldn't be able to teach at all. If only there's a cry room so tt young kids like JX (who aren't able to sit still yet) can play ard while Mummy attends service.

After service, it's feeding of JX lunch. I've to be a Super Mummy on Every Sundays. Carrying mei mei in pouch while she sleeps on 1 hand & carrying JX up on the toilet seat using another hand. Carry mei mei in pouch on 1 hand while taking/feeding lunch to JX in another hand. Seriously, I don't mean to show off I'm a Super Mummy but I've not much of a choice but to be one on Sundays. If mei mei is awake, I'll try to get someone to carry her so that I can spend some time with JX. If not, he'll be off to toilets & playing flushes & taps. Others may be thinking how pathethic I'm. Haha. Most mummies there have maids to assist in taking care of the kids. If I'm in CBC, I would hv the luxurious help from my mum & all the uncles & aunties who would play with JX & mei mei. Added with a big space for JX to roam about but hopefully not get lost.

Sorry if I sound as though I'm complaining. I'll try to be positive now.

I'll & I shall continue to fulfil my responsiblity as a wife, a preacher's wife & a mother in this present church. God has given Super Mummy strength to carry 2 kids & take care of them myself so that Sam can focus on his ministry. God has given me some Aunties who willingly help to carry Mei Mei (haha they enjoy carrying her). How can I also forget God had helped me through helpless situations (marathon crying session between the 2 kids at the start)?! Now, I'm managing better my own; why am I still complaining & comparing?

Perhaps just lacking in the spiritual component. I truly wish to listen to sermons & to worship God. Please pray that JX would be willing to part with Mummy for just 1hr. As for fellowship & prayer support, none for now but hopefully the church will start to have some Mummies sharing & prayer group.

Updates again

2010-06-04T15:51:00.002+08:00

JX is 29mth old (2yrs, 5mth) & Aletheia is 9 months old

I realized that many things remain status quo & stagnant

if we let Time pass by just like that...

especially for a Stay Home Mum like me.

Looking after Young Kids is a lot about -

ROUTINE!!!

Ok Mummy Carol's daily schedule goes like this -

8am: Wake

8.30am: Feed JX breakfast; breastfeed ZZ

9am: Playtime

10am: ZZ's 1st nap

10-11am: Reading time with JX; Supervise helper as she cooks lunch

11.30am: ZZ wakes; breastfeed ZZ

11.45am: Prepare ZZ's porridge (Steam Fish, Strain Vege)

12pm: Feed JX's lunch; then feed ZZ's lunch

1pm: Bathe Kids

2pm: Let Kids take their nap

4pm: ZZ wakes & Breastfeed; then JX wakes

4.30pm: JX's Tea

5pm-6pm: Playtime

7pm: Feed JX's Dinner, ZZ's porridge

8pm-9pm: Bathe Kids & Bible Story Time

9pm: ZZ's Sleeptime; JX's individual Bible Story Time

10pm: JX's Sleeptime

11pm-7am: About 2-3times nightfeed for ZZ & JX's diaper change

Sounds Free or Sounds Busy???

Haha. To me, I find myself 'busier' than being a Social Worker.

Added with sleepless nights, it can be a challenge.

I find myself busier than the helper too.

But Sam & I prefer to look after the kids' needs all by ourselves.

In particular, we make it a rule that only PaPa & Mummy can bathe the kids & assist them in passing motion/urine.

I've gotten used to waking up at nights & having strength to cope by the next day.

Praise God for His grace is sufficient.

Last year was truly a trying year for me

when I was expecting & having marathons of sleepless nights

due to JX's frequent night waking & pregnancy related insomnia.

I woke up each morning feeling jet-lagged & moody.

It was last year when I complained that I needed help from Sam & parents.

Thank God that my vigor was restored after giving birth

& by God's grace, JX & Aletheia sleeps better now.

Thank my Mummy for helping out on Tue-Fri too!

Beside Routine daily,

taking care of kids also involve repetition, reading, reciting...

Children's memory are Superb

& they learn quickly.

Jian Xin is able to memorise the 1st 4 Catechism -

1. Who Made You? God Made Me.

2. What else did God make? God made all things.

3. Why did God make you & all things? For His Own Glory.

4. How can we glorify God? By loving Him & doing what he commands.

I've created a Recitation Chart & JX would recite the answers to PaPa daily

& Papa would give him a stamp.=)

I would have a lesson on Catechism (Q&A on biblical doctrines) once a week

(teaching materials from the Kids Quest! Catechism Club Teacher's Manual).

By end of this year, JX would have memorized 28 Q&A.

May God help Mummy to be diligent in teaching JX

& may God mould JX to be a God loving child.

Please keep me in prayers that I would have more patience in teaching JX.

Need lots of prayers for this.

As for Alphabets,

I've taught JX the letters A, B, C, D, E.

He's able to recognize these letters now

but still get confused over the lower case letters.

That's about all for JX

& what Mummy has been teaching since April.

It's easy to start but not easy to persevere on. Keep me in prayers.

Now for Baby Aletheia.

She's napping & sleeping well - with no Fusses/Cries lately.

We place her down in her cot & she'll sit up many times

but she'll finally sleep on her own quietly.

However, we'll exclaim "Aiyoh, Mei Mei sit up again after placing her down" many times.

We couldn't be angry with her at all as she gives us this cheeky grin/smile each time she sits up in her cot & raise her hands.

Yep she's getting PLAYFUL!

I remind myself to enjoy Aletheia at her baby years now

because she'll outgrow her Baby-ness very soon.

And soon, she'll be like Kor Kor (a toddler).

I guess Aletheia is really a pleasant baby to take care of (for now).

Though I've posted many pics of Aletheia on FB, it doesn't mean

I care 'less' for JX. (Hope nobody thinks that way.)

Do you know we took pics of JX almost everyday with DSLR camera last time?

But we don't take pics of Aletheia daily.

Haha Sam always remind me to use camera & not my mobile to take pics for Aletheia.

Hope I won't be too lazy.

It's more convenient to upload mobile pics into FB.

Hmm why I take more pics of Aletheia now?

Besides the convenient use of mobile phone,

perhaps because JX moves too much & it's hard to capture him.

Haha.

Nonetheless, I love both my kids equally.

It's true! I've no preference at the start anyway.

At home, I try to spend more time with JX - reading with him

whenever I can.

When we are out, I often have to carry Aletheia in a pouch

so I would have to spend less time with him.

Alright that's all for now.

Thank God for making Mothers Strong.

捨不得

2010-05-27T14:40:00.004+08:00

Hello I'm back here blogging via iPhone as kids are asleep in the room. Hehe I still have not started blogging at Word press. Truly hope to start soon.

捨不得 - Contentment in Simplicity III
When I was previously working as a Social Worker, job revolves around meeting clients, counselling, reports, youth club & youth programmes & lots of teaching which I enjoyed.

Now, besides looking after the kids, my job revolves around Groceries - what food to buy daily & what to cook daily. Every morning, I've to discuss with the helper what groceries and poultry/vegetables to buy daily. A very Auntie life. But no choice, we've to cook meals for an elderly, 2kids & 2-5 adults daily. Lately, Song En told me to budget the amount of groceries & food bought. Yeah if we don't budget, it truly amounts much.

Our helper has been here for 4mths. As her culture & food tt she eats back at home are somehow different, there's lots to supervise upon to ensure things get done properly especially when cooking for elderly & kids.

Yep basically, I eat really simply for days when I'm home but I do ensure that the meal includes vege & a meat so that my body can produce sufficient to breastfeed mei mei. I've become really thrifty or rather circumstances has taught me to be so. I will eat home cooked meals unless we're out on Song En's off days. It's cheaper that way. Despite the same usual dishes tt helper knows how to cook, I just eat. Haha. Food to me is not a luxury but for survival & strength. Haha. And also the best of fish (ngoh he) are reserved for Ah Po & best of pork (you jipork) reserved for JX. 所以，很多舍不得吃。Haha.

Now I realise that Groceries, food & household expenses cost a lot. As helper is staying with us, all meals (for family & Sam's parents) are
cooked here. Wow Sam's mum has to spend so much on food. Yep so it's wise that we manage our finances properly.

During Sam's off days, we usually eat Subway cos JX enjoys eating them. Lately, we enjoy Cup Walker Bubble Tea as well - Cheap with lots of yummy pearls. We'll splurge more whenever we go out with Noah/pastors/Kaiqi on Sun evenings. So those are times I get to eat lots of
yummy food. But most of the time, I couldn't enjoy it slowly as I would be carrying Mei Mei while eating so gotta finish it up quickly.

Oooh... There's lots of yummy food tt I like & miss eating but they're all so foreign to me now. Another portrayal of my life in simplicity. Even
my mum prefers to eat outside meals cos she finds the rice hard. Haha even the helper eats less rice. Aiyoh even I, myself not choosy. Just eat what we have for Strength daily la.

Eat simply for now till I meet those yummy food again next time...

My mum has asked me to join CBC church camp. Though it appears really fun to attend with the kids, it isn't possible for us to go. If I go, think the helper won't hv to bathe for those days nobody is home. Also nobody to help her supervise Ah po. So going overseas now shall be put on hold.

Cya.

Some updates

2010-05-06T13:40:00.002+08:00

Hello everyone, sorry I've not been blogging for some time. I've set up a new blog at wordpress but have not started blogging there yet because I would need some time to explore how to use it.

Hmm I think as we grow older, we tend to be more cautious in writing about the content of our blog entry. In my case in particular, I've to exercise more caution in blog or FB being a pastor's wife. At times, I've to ask Song En to edit for me. At times i've to delete what was written. So often, i've to keep things to myself.

Yeah lately I felt that I lost contact with many people especially CBC friends & school friends. As time passes, the relationship feels more & more distant. Sigh. I'm really such a lousy person/friend as I don't actively keep in contact with others. I tried my best to update myself on FB so that I can keep in contact with others & for others to get update on me. But content is mostly superficial given the above reasons - mostly what I wrote have to be positive.

Yeah last time I loved to share with others through email. At the start when we left CBC, I wanted to update ourselves through email like what Huifen always does now when she is overseas. I pondered upon who would be interested anyways & ultimately, I'm in another church & I can't do anything for any of them already besides prayers. Gradually as time passes, things are left where it is. Yeah guess I'm too introvert a person for people to be influenced & remembered upon. Added with all our busy commitments, relationships are at status quo.

Sadly for now, I don't have any peers in my present church. So truly miss sharing & prayers for each other in CBC last time. Haha Huifen shared in FB about having rusty mind as she's probably more free now? Guess I've been having a rusty mind for 2.5 years. Not that I'm free but I'm busy daily & lacking behind spiritually & out of fellowship.

Thank God that I've started attending service 2 Sundays ago! Jian Xin didn't cry for Mummy at all. Sigh I should have prayed & left him alone in Sunday Class earlier. I feel much happier being able to attend service & listen to sermons.

I've started to teach Jian Xin catheism - short question & answer regarding biblical doctrine. Q.1: Who made you? Ans: God made me. Q.2: What else did God make? Ans: God made all things. Jian Xin also memorized "The chief end of man is to Glorify God & to Enjoy Him forever." Sam & I felt that it was important for JX to learn the catheism now. Sam said it was more important than learning ABCs. So Mummy has to teach him & let him recite it.

For the past month, we have stopped letting JX watch Educational programmes on TV as we thought that watching or not doesn't make any difference to him. So, we let him watch during weekends only. Haha JX doesn't fuss & doesn't bug me to watch TV too. Without the TV, think Mummy is able to spend more time with him.

It has always been a challenge parenting JX. He can be active & has quite a temper. May God help Sam & I to have lots of wisdom to parent him.

As for little Mei Mei, she is able to sit without support now. So at times we'll place her inside the playpen to play on her own. She takes 3 naps per day & naps on her own w/o much fuss if given a proper routine. But there are times when she'll cry herself to sleep. People might think we're cruel to let her cry but she'll sleep better in the long term. Each time she cries to sleep, Mummy feels heartache but will pray for her to sleep.

Alright that's all for now. Blogging here on iPhone. :)

2010-03-10T15:39:00.002+08:00

Yeah Time really Flies...

So many of my old CBC church youths

are either studying, in NS or working already.

Dear Jia Min is a teacher now. =)

And some of our CBC peers are married, preparing for marriage,

or having their 1st child.

Yes I do really Miss Tuanqi & church life very much!

At present, I still accompany Jian Xin for his Sunday School

while the adults are having their service.

So for those who are able to attend service & tuanqi,

do treasure those times & attend it enthusiastically!

Hmm...lately, I felt that I had been rather busy.

I've much adjusted to having a baby & a toddler

& with a routine, things appeared to be more manageable.

I would like to give THANKS to GOD that Jian Xin is able to sleep on his own,

without his mother needing to be beside him since 3 weeks ago.

I told him that Mummy sleeps on Mummy's bed & Jian Xin sleeps on his own bed.

I also added some fun by saying that Mummy's bed is hard; but Jian Xin's bed is most comfortable (story from Goldilocks & the 3 Bears).

I should have trained him earlier to do so! Haha.

As for Aletheia, she is able to sleep on her own as well.

However, she would still cry herself to sleep at times.

It can be heart wrenching to hear her cry;

in particular, with grandmother, my mum & maid all inquiring about her cries.

But, we have to train her to sleep on her own so that she's able to sleep better for naps & for the night.

Yeah we learnt our lessons of not training JX to sleep on his own previously

& hence facing much difficulties of weaning him off nurse to sleep & to sleep on his own.

Babies can be Trained & they adjust very quickly (mostly in 3 days, they would hv adjusted).

And it's easier to train babies when they are younger! :)

If not, you'll have to constantly fret about different sleep props (cradle to sleep, yao lan, pacifier, drink milk) to help baby sleep.

Thank Lord that Aletheia is able to sleep on her own.

Oh yep...I mentioned that lately, I had been busy.

Hmm perhaps busy over cooking at times & over how to be a better mother.

May God help me to be a good mother -

Never shout at Jian Xin & be more patient & loving towards him.

Also, to discipline him when necessary.

It's truly a struggle for me.

I found myself always falling into shouting at JX when he doesn't listen to me.

Sigh & I dread it when I shout at him

as I truly do not wish for him to model after me in that area.

May God help me & do keep me in prayers.

Generally, I'm rather happy -

perhaps because I started reading the Bible aloud for myself & Jian Xin.

Hopefully, I would be able to persist.

Hmm...a small area of concern that I have is that Sam's parents have been busy

to spend TIME with their grandchildren...

this would greatly affect their bond.

Happy CNY 2010

2010-02-20T16:07:00.002+08:00

Happy Chinese New Year to Everyone!

Hey sorry for not blogging for a while...

guess I've been busy with cooking.

Yep, lately, I've been trying to cook one new dish daily.

As we've a helper around, meals are cooked at my place

& so we've all the pots, pans & condiments needed for cooking.

Furthermore, our helper prefers frying & cooking rather spicy stuff

so, I've decided to try cooking myself.

It has been rather enjoyable!

I love cooking the dishes for Jian Xin & Grandmother.

Hehe they both would never complain about the simple dishes I cooked.

Steamed fish, Sauced Chicken, Steamed Chicken, Steamed Egg, Meatballs, Soups...

I'm thankful that the helper is staying with us.

Though we might have communication breakdown, she's nonetheless a great Help to us.

Yay...I don't have to wash the pots/pans/dishes after cooking.

I've pretty sensitive skin so I'll get dry, scaly skin on my fingers

if I use the detergent/soap too often.

So, I'm happy that our helper could help in this area.

And also assist in cleaning the house.

Since Ah Po & the helper arrived, I've started clearing up MUCH!!!

Even Sam's very messy Study Room was cleared up

& our storeroom is stacked up neatly with Toyogo boxes. =)

Let me give some updates on JX's progress here as well..

JX is progressing well in his verbal skills

& is able to phrase sentences like “我们要去舅舅的家。”

Lately, he is able to feed himself with the spoon as well

& he is eating very well despite others remarking that he is thin.

JX really eats very well so I think he's probably too active to be fat.

He is 70% toilet trained - at home, he would let us know if he wants to urine.

But I've not tried letting him go w/o the diapers for nap/sleep/outside of home.

JX loves whining pretty often these days -

he whines & cries when he isn't able to express what he wants & hence doesn't get what he wants.

So, Sam & I have used the cane to discipline whenever necessary.

He has thus learnt to fear the cane as a disciplinary instrument, which is good.

JX is starting to love & care for his sister as well -

he wouldn't cry/fuss when I need to feed Mei Mei.

Whenever Mei Mei cries, he would ask me to carry her.

Whenever others mentioned that they want to bring Mei Mei home,

he would exclaim, "Mummy, carry Mei Mei."

JX is still very very Active.

Where ever we go, he would be bustling with energy & running about.

Many would remark that JX appears to be a very active boy.

May God help him to settle down & sit still when school starts next time.

Now for Mei Mei's Progress -

Dear Aletheia has been growing much physically

though much smaller than her brother when he was 5mths old then.

Many said that she looked like her father now.

Yeah she has huge eyes & bigger nose like Sam. Haha.

But she has a little mouth like her Mummy.

For now, she doesn't appear to be as active as her brother.

As for motor skills, she has learnt to roll but not learn to flip yet.

Starting last month, she wants us to carry her to sleep =(

& would cry whenever she was placed on cot on her own.

So, Sam & I have been training her to sleep on her own,

which means that we let her cry to sleep at times (approximately for 15mins).

There are some successes as Sam is more persistent than me.

Thank God that she is able to sleep on her own better at night.

Whenever I gave her a full feed & switch off the lights,

she would be able to sleep on her own in her cot.

She's really adorable as she loves to smile.

And she loves her brother very much

& would love to see her brother playing.

2010-01-26T14:13:00.003+08:00

We've 2 new members in our household today!!!
After Sam & Jia En discussed, we decided that dear Po Dou (Sam's grandmother)
would be staying at our place.
Certainly accompanied by the new maid (legally/officially).
Yeah not having a maid in my entire life,
this is something very queer & rather uncomfortable for me!!!
Having someone calling you "Ma'am",
having to instruct someone to do things,
having someone to clear my things,
etc. etc.
lacking personal prviacy
& not having things the messy way we always have. Haha.
It's truly an adjustment for our family.
Sam & I both expressed uneasiness
but we know that this arrangement was the best alternative
for grandmother & maid & others...
So, dear Mummy Carol has to adjust, adapt & accomodate.
But truly I never wanted a maid
but well...
Just take it that "I need a helper to help the housework" then
so that grandma & maid could come over our place.
though in reality, Sam & I were more comfortable with a less than tidy house. Haha.
So, Visitors, you'll enter a tidy house next time.
And you'll see our grandmother & a maid.
But the main task for the maid is to look after grandmother
& to cook meals.
I will still be the main caregiver & parent of my children.
So, I still do everything -
from feeding the children, bathing them, playing with them.
Nah...feel so queer with having a neat house with
all stuff stored/stacked up in cabinets/drawers...
The maid would ask me whether she can pack this & that...
so I've to say "Ok" as maid has her responsibility right?
Actually, I told her to rest...hmm...
Alright that's all.
May God grant all of us smooth adjustments.

2010-01-16T23:40:00.002+08:00

Another invisible post...

Lately, JX's grandfather had not been playing with him. Perhaps JX didn't want to play with him readily so it became reciprocal on both sides. He mentioned that JX was particularly bu ting hua. Perhaps that might be another reason I presume...that might have resulted in grandfather not playing with his grandson? Grandfather often felt that if JX was his own son, he would have disciplined (beat) him...perhaps he thinks that JX's parents weren't strict enough with JX & allowed him to play freely but yet he couldn't interfere. Hmm. I felt rather sad & disturbed at times even though words weren't implied directly. Am I such an incompetent mother...my son is so playful & lack of discipline? If JX's own grandfather think of him that way & wouldn't attempt to play with him, I wonder who else would. Yeah as a mother, I know my son is playful & active & at times, he can be truly bu ting hua & lately he has started to whine...he may not be those friendly, good natured, guai little fellas...but JX do have his strengths - he's really a bright little boy. He enjoys reading & he could sit still for half an hour listening to stories (like the Cat in the Hat) from Dr. Seuss books. Books like the Cat in the Hat are those wordy type of books & I'm surprised JX enjoys them. JX loves music - he learns the lyrics of songs quickly & could sing to the rhythm of the music. May God help me to love JX more & more & may God help me to discipline him when necessary. May God help Grandfather to try to understand & look to the positives of JX.

Irony in Life

2010-01-14T15:32:00.006+08:00

Ironies in Life

The Happiest Day in Year 2009
was also the Saddest Day in Year 2009 -
1st September 2009.
As I recalled the moments in my life last year, it dawned upon me that 1st Sep 09 was a day when I felt most happy yet most sad.
On 1st September 2009 6.30am,
I realized that my water bag had burst &
was pleasantly happy that Baby Aletheia would be born.
At the same time, my mind was racing & occupied with how would dear Jian Xin be taken care of without his Mummy for the 1st time.
During the process of labor before the pain started,
I was constantly worrying for Jian Xin -
Had he eaten? Had he taken his nap? How was he feeling? Did he cry?
How I wished Jian Xin was at my side as well so that I could comfort him.
He must had been very sad to be alone.
I called my mum several times & also asked Sam to check on Jian Xin.
At 12.45pm, I gave birth to Aletheia after a short yet very painful labor.
I felt overjoyed to be able to experience labor pains & to endure it through with God's grace.
I had always wanted to experience these pains.
I didn't get to experience it for Jian Xin as I took epidural after enduring it for 4hrs.
I felt so Thankful to God that I was allowed to experience labor pains for at least 2 hours. Yes. It was for 2 hours plus only - God had been so gracious.
For Song En, I think he probably felt most thankful to God
that I survived the birth process after having some complications while clearing up the placenta.
Song En witnessed that I had haemorrhage - heavy internal bleeding
after giving birth to Aletheia. Doctor Tan called in more nurses to assist.
I was rather confused to what was happening
but felt pretty uncomfortable when doctors started to press my womb.
Each time they pressed the womb, I could feel blood oozing out of my body.
I didn't realize that it was a lot of blood.
They had no choice but to keep pressing so that the uterus would contract & the bleeding would stop. I recalled Dr. Tan saying "Sorry" to me a couple of times.
After much pressing & digging into my womb to clear out stuff,
the bleeding stopped miraculously.
Anyway, I didn't know the severity of the whole situation then till Sam narrated it to the others.
Every birth process has its complications...
So It's Always a Miracle when a Child is Born!!!
Jian Xin was found with the Umbilical Cord around his head when he came out...
Praise Lord for His Sovereign Grace & Mercy!
The person I wished to see most after my labor was Dear Jian Xin.
Back at the ward, I called my mum to check whether Jian Xin had taken his nap &
what time would they be coming.
Being a stay home mum who had taken care of Jian Xin for 20 months,
I believe the mother-son bond would have been very close.
Even though I had just given birth then, I couldn't really "rest" even when I was exhausted because of my constant worry for my son.
I truly couldn't do much then but to pray to God & entrust.
While waiting for Jian Xin to visit his Mummy in KKH,
I started learning to breastfeed again.
Needless to say, it was so much easier to breastfeed Aletheia than Jian Xin given my wealth of experience. Haha.
Dear Aletheia started proper latch on straight after I gave birth to her at the delivery room.
Clever little Girl!
At about 5pm, the pastors from CBC came to visit me.
Due to the H1N1 regulation then, only 2 visitors could visit me each time.
I wondered when would be Little Jian Xin's turn.
I was holding Aletheia when Jian Xin entered the room.
When he saw me, he had a rather perplexing expression...
I called him but he appeared to be distracted.
I said, "Mummy, Bao Bao." But he refused.
He didn't want to look at me.
At that moment, I felt so heartbroken.
He didn't want his Mummy already because Mummy had made him so sad.
The dynamics had totally changed with the addition of Aletheia.
At that moment, I didn't want to carry Aletheia any longer so I put her back in the cot & tried to communicate with Jian Xin but he appeared to be so distracted or rather disturbed.
I cried.
My mother & brother were wondering why I cried when I was supposed to be happy after giving birth.
My brother tried to console me by saying that Jian Xin would understand.
After Jian Xin returned home with my in-laws,
Song en also returned home with Noah & Shufen to get his car.
I was alone in the ward -
Worried for Jian Xin (How would he survive the night w/o his Mummy?),
Utterly sad when JX didn't want his Mummy,
Wanting to see new baby & breastfeed her.
I tried walking to the nursery to take a look at her.
Yeah it was really queer for a lady who had just given birth to walk out of the ward right... Hmm, I didn't get such 'luxury' of being alone & walking out of the ward for the previous birth. Haha.
Soon, baby Aletheia was sent over to Mummy for feed.
I tried feeding her at 9pm...
No problems latching on but I guess milk supply wasn't here yet.
But I persisted till 11pm.
I decided to send her back to the nursery. I told Nurse, "I tried my Best to feed her, but think she was still hungry. So, please help to top up."
During the time when Song En was away (8.30pm-12am),
a very nice Xiaomin Mummy was texting me & asking me how I felt & supporting me. Thank you Xiaomin for understanding how I felt towards Jian Xin.
I believe stay at home Mums have a stronger bond with their children.
Song En was truly exhausted when he returned to the ward.
I told him that I was tired & we decided to give baby Aletheia formula for the night. I couldn't really sleep as usual...
1st September 2009 -
A day with overwhelming emotions.
Praise God for the birth of Aletheia.
Till now, Jian Xin is still adjusting to having a baby sister.
Dynamics have changed.
May God help him to learn to "love" with the addition of a sister.

2010-01-03T18:04:00.003+08:00

Jan 2010 ~ JX at 2 years, Aletheia at 4 mths

Picture taken on 9th Sept 2009 (when Aletheia was just 9days old)

Picture taken on the 14th Dec 2009 (when Aletheia was 3 mths)

Wow how time flies swiftly!
I'm a Stay-Home-Mum for 2 whole years already.
And now, a Mother of 2.
Yes, my life is at present: Home-Based & Simple.
When I see pictures in FB of church friends/ex-colleagues
serving actively in Church & working with youths,
I feel so happy for them & do "miss" all these.
I miss caring for others,
I miss praying with others,
I miss teaching,
I miss listening to others,
I miss counselling,
I miss writing...
Haha.
Amidst all the "misses",
I recognize the importance of staying at home to look after the children.
I wouldn't trade this even if given any form of monetary rewards.
I wouldn't give up parenting the children on my own
even if my mum or in-laws are able to look after them.
My own family of origin has totally different values from me.
I presume that my children would probably be socialized with some form of addictions
if I left my children in their care.
As for Sam's family who appear to be more 'ideal' due to similarity of Christian values,
we couldn't deny that personal flaws & habits in the older generation are
difficult to get rid of.
Perhaps Jian Xin might be more quick-tempered & naggy?
Haha.
Ultimately, I'm still the most "ideal" person to look after my own children.
I know I'm not the "best" mother & I do have my personal flaws.
But I'm willing to change so that I could raise both children with Godly love.
It has been a challenge for me to parent Jian Xin.
At times, I wonder why Jian Xin is such an active child.
He never keeps "STILL" unless he's reading/being read to or asleep. Haha.
He runs about & can be rather tense & grouchy at times.
Jian Xin doesn't sleep readily too & he wakes up 2-3x to find Mummy at night.
He doesn't listen to Mummy at times either.
I think what I can do best is to pray for him.
I had taught him to memorize 2 bible verses.
1st: 你们作儿女的，要在主里听从父母，这是理所当然的。（Ep 6: 1)
2nd: 要常常喜乐，不住的祷告。(Thess 5: 16,17)
Yeah, he knows how to say it but I don't think he conceptualizes it.
Haha.
Hopefully he would soon...
Alright...will blog again next time.

Living in Simplicity III

2009-12-18T14:10:00.002+08:00

Living in Simplicity III
One word to Sum up my present life is Simplicity.
All of us have different roles in our lives at different points of time.
What is your role in life?
Presently, my roles in terms of priority:
1. Mother
2. Wife
3. Daughter/Daughter-in-law
4. Pastor's Wife in Church
5. Friends to others
Yes, motherhood has taken the Priority Role in my life presently.
I ponder about the children most of the time.
When I want to buy food, I would think about what food that JX would eat.
Hence often, I would eat what the maid cooks
so that JX would have home-cooked food that is supposedly healthier.
I've been eating what the maid has been cooking for lunch & dinner since birth of JX
though at times, some meals were unappealing.
Eating what the maid has cooked for Sam's family has indeed helped to save costs.
Though I would made certain complaints here & there at times,
I would still continue eating simply.
I wouldn't spend on myself; but I would spend on the children.
When I go for grocery shopping,
I would often purchase foodstuff that JX eats -
Formula/Fresh Milk (Farmhouse/Meiji), Kiwi, Banana,
Fish, Eggs, Honey Stars, Bread, Petit Miam (Fromage Frais for Toddlers),
etc. etc.
Groceries truly amount to a lot of $$$.
Yes, so often I would think about JX even when it comes to meal times.
If we bought noodles to eat, we would purchase non-chilli
so that JX is able to eat them as well (even though Mummy loves noodles with lots of chilli).
When the meals are brought over to our place,
I would scan to see what food there is for JX to eat.
At times, I would add steamed egg or fish for JX.
I would feed JX his meals
while I quickly gobbled up my meal.
I think you'll be surprised at the amazing speed that I eat my meals now.
Food to me now is not much of an enjoyment (though I still enjoy eating ice-cream & chocolates at times). LOL.
But I do ensure that I eat sufficiently (rice with meat & vegetables)
so that my body is able to produce milk for baby Aleltheia.
Though I'm still "Fat", I cannot diet because I need to eat well
so that baby Aletheia can have good nutrition from my breast milk.
Breastfeeding burns off about 500 calories per day (depending on how much you feed)
so you need to replenish some of those calories lost.
Hence, even when it comes to meals,
it's not for Myself alone but I have to think about what benefits baby.
I'm willing to eat simply yet wisely.
Therefore, I try to abstain from spicy food so that it wouldn't affect the breastmilk.
Guess my MIL knows I often eat home cooked meals
so we'll get treats to 'outside' meals during weekends at times.
Besides meal wise,
shopping for myself is minimal & close to zero.
I don't see the point in buying clothes/shoes/bag for myself since I'm home most of the time.
But if I do purchase shoes, I would buy a rather expensive one so that it would last me for a year+. Haha.
So, last month, I bought a pair of Americaya shoes as my old pair of Clarks shoes was worn out.
xxx
In sum, my life at present
is not about ME;
but the Children.
Yeah indeed being a Mother brings out the unconditional love a Mother has for a child.
Though at times, it brings out the "worst" in us as well
when I flared out at them in fits of anger.
Looking back over how I lived the past 2 years,
it seems truly amazing how SIMPLE my life has been.
xxx
Motherhood has also taught me to be "relaxed" in certain matters.
Previously before I was pregnant,
I was a rather cleanliness freak.
I would tidy my house & ensure that it is spotlessly clean
especially when visitors were coming over.
Nah, with pregnancy & after birth of 2 children,
energy has been sapped to the fullest & the little time that I have when the children are asleep,
I would prefer to use it for some leisure (nap, reading, FB, & TV).
I would just ensure the basic cleanliness of the house
& do the basic chores of washing clothes/dishes, vacuuming & mopping floor.
If given 2 choices with time constraints -
To Tidy the house or To Spend time with your children,
which would you choose?
So readers & friends, apologies if you happen to enter into a less than tidy home
when you visit me.
It is definitely an eye sore; but close one eye & enjoy time with the kids...
That's what a home is like isn't it? Haha.
Perhaps you still wouldn't understand?
Perhaps in the future, you would when you've active children like JX. LOL.

Upset with Myself

2009-12-01T22:28:00.002+08:00

God brings me through helpless times...
Often, I blog more deeply when I'm feeling down...
I realized that these days, I've been blogging lesser,
not because I've no 'down' moments
but one of the reasons may be due to my status as a Pastor's Wife.
At times, it might not be appropriate for me to write certain things.
So even when I blog or add an entry in FB or add a pic on FB,
I've to be cautious & tactful.
Hmm...
Today is a rather upsetting day -
Upset with myself actually.
I flared up at JX for not opening his mouth to eat his lunch.
I hate to flare up at JX.
May God truly help me to change my temperament
so that JX wouldn't model after my bad temperament.
Besides the above,
I felt rather upset with myself
for not being able to be a support to Sam's ministry;
instead being a stumbling block.
Though there were no open complaints about me as an really inactive Pastor's Wife,
I personally know my flaws.
All I do mainly is to coop myself up in the office to look after the 2 kids.
This sounds less than desirable...
& I felt I am not who I am in church.
Nobody knows me during this whole year.
Likewise, I do not know much people either
as I hardly communicate with them.
I wonder if others have expectations of me as a Pastor's wife.
But I believe I failed totally.
Each Sunday is a battlefield for me.
Jian Xin gets grumpy at times & expressed a grumpy look at others
who wants to play with him.
He doesn't readily let others play with him.
Last Sunday, JX was in a super grouchy mood
& I took him to the office as I thought he wanted to nap.
But he started crying non-stop.
His cries frightened his little sister who started wailing loudly as well.
With 2 children crying at the top of their voices, I was totally stressed out
& almost pulled my hairs out.
Initially, Shi Mu was helping me with Mei Mei
but she returned Mei Mei to me as she appeared to be hungry.
So, I fed Mei Mei (while JX continued to cry loudly) & placed her on pram thereafter.
As JX continued his crying mania, Mei Mei started wailing.
Arghh...what shall I do?
I prayed.
I cradled JX.
I spanked JX.
Both still crying!
Would their cries disturb service?
I SMSed my MIL to pray for JX.
My final resort: I called Sam (who was the Zhu Xi)
Shi Mu came into the office after teaching the kids.
Song En came shortly (during middle of the service).
Shi Mu took JX out & distracted him.
I carried Mei Mei & she slept.
Peace at last.
I realized that God has indeed led me through many helpless (无可奈何）moments in my life,
even though I made much complaints & expressed much lack of faith/trust.
神都帮我经过这些无可奈何的时刻！
Sadly, I couldn't be much of a support to Sam for now.
Hopefully, I wouldn't be a stumbling block (which I did for last Sun - I called him & he had to come out during the middle of the service).
Being inactive, being dependent on Sam...
I believe all these would lead to more criticisms...
Hmm...
What shall I do?
What can I do?
May God teach me & help me through
like He has always bring me through in helpless moments.

It's great not to be a Preggie state

2009-11-24T14:48:00.006+08:00

It's great not to be 'Pregnant'!
Yeah I'm happy to regain much vigor after giving birth to Aletheia
as the last trimester for the pregnancy was truly exhausting.
I'm happy that I'm able to carry JX now & bring him to the playground
(previously, I avoided carrying JX too often as I had a low placenta).
I truly want to give Thanks to God that I'm able to sleep Much Better
after the birth of Aletheia as well.
(Previously had marathon of sleepless nights in the last trimester & lots of waking up from JX)
Thank Lord that Aletheia sleeps well in the night
so it's still manageable even when she wakes 2-3x per night for feed.
With my Mummy coming from Tues-Fri to help me out,
I'm able to start cooking for JX as well.
So, I'm happy that I can start cooking rice cum simple dishes for JX.
xxx
JX has been SICK in Sep 09...
JX hardly gets sick since Feb 09.
But he fell sick in end Sept till now.
In late Sept, he had some infection that resulted in lymp nodes swelling in his head
so he had to take antiobiotics (Augmentine) that causes diarrhoea as side effect.
He had to take the antibiotics for 2 weeks so he had on-off diarrhoea for almost a week plus. So we pumped him with lots of water.
Diarrhoea caused JX to reduce lots of weight.
After completing the course of antibiotics, JX was well & happy
till he had slight flu (that lasted for 2-3days).
After his flu, JX had severe diarrhoea that lasted for almost a week plus -
JX probably got the Rotavirus.
So, we pumped him with lots of water.
Diarrhoea caused JX to slim down again...
After JX got well, dear Mummy started to 'fatten' him up with milk & steam eggs etc.
The following week after he was well, JX started having rashes (hives or "feng mok") probably due to food allergy.
So, for consecutive weeks, JX became sick.
Nonetheless, JX is still very happy & active.
At present, he doesn't have hives for 6days & he's completing his course of medication.
I've started giving him milk this week & will 'gradually' re-introduce food like egg, berries & seafood in his meal.
May God grant him complete recovery from his hives.
xxx
Thank Lord that Aletheia Naps Well
I truly wish to give Thanks to God that Aletheia
is able to nap/sleep on her own when placed on bed./pram (starting from the 9th week).
She appears to prefer lying down to sleep than being cradled on our arms.
So, after a good feed & after playing on her own (staring at her left hand),
she will fall asleep on her own in her cot.
This was something unthinkable for me personally
because last time I had to tediously carry JX to sleep or nurse him to sleep (but had since weaned JX in the 17th month)...
till now, he needs his Mummy to accompany him to sleep.
Perhaps I'm too busy to give Aletheia pampered attention & treatment (unlike for the 1st child)
So often, I've to tell her, "Wait ah, Mummy needs to feed Kor Kor or let Kor Kor sleep 1st."
Therefore, I would have to ignore her gentle on-off whimpers at times...
but perhaps this helped her to learn to sleep on her own?
Nonetheless, I truly thank Lord for that...
as Aletheia patiently sleeps on her own,
I'm able to spend more time with JX!
Thank you Aletheia for being such a patient & thoughtful child, so young as you are.
xxx
Hehe I wonder if anyone still reads this simple blog of mine.
Apologies that I've not been updating it as I've spent more time on FB lately.
It's really easier to upload pictures from my iphone to FB directly.
Basically, I hope that my blog will chronicle/diary the progress of JX & Aletheia & mainly my struggles in Motherhood & parenting.

2009-10-17T09:31:00.002+08:00

Jian Xin, a brother at 20th month old

Pictures taken at the Zoo in May 09
It was JX's 1st time to the Zoo
but haha he was too tired & slept halfway through.
He was 17th month old then & was still the 'only' child.

Having a new Baby in the family
is a transition for us all.
I think Jian Xin being so young...
having a Sister would have more impact on him
eventhough he isn't able to express his feelings through words yet.
JX doesn't mention that he "don't like Mei Mei" any longer.
But occasionally, he'll say "Put Back Box";
he meant to say put back Mei Mei in Cot when he saw me carrying Mei Mei
during those times he wanted my attention (for play/nap).

Having a new Sister meant lesser time with Mummy...
so JX has became more independent & less reliant on me.
He plays with his aerolanes, helicopter, train, cranes & trucks
on his own when I bf baby.
At times, I felt sad that I couldn't afford the time & energy
to play & read books with him unlike before.
JX has been reading lesser & lesser as a result...
I'm happy that my mum & my mil would try to read with him
whenever possible.

As JX is approaching Terrible Twos,
he gets more disobedient as he asserts his wants/needs.
I've spanked him several times out of anger & frustration
which I know I should not have.
May God grant me wisdom & calmness to discipline JX.
JX can be really cheeky & playful.
Eg. 2 days ago, his ye ye told JX to put his leg down from the table while having his meal. JX refused & was beaten at his foot. JX put down his leg & showed a cheeky face & put his leg up again 2x & deliberately waited to see how ye ye would respond.

JX's Latest Progress:
Dear JX has been progressing fast in verbal skills & fine motor skills.
He is able to buckle his own seat belt on highchair
& has tried to feed himself with a spoon.

JX is as chatty as ever.
He hasn't been learning much new words from books lately...
perhaps I've lesser time to teach him or perhaps JX had Mummy to read his books many times & had lost its novelty - Nothing new to learn?
I've to start teaching him new things!
JX memorises stories & words.
His collection of vocabulary (for objects, colors, shapes etc.) comes through seeing the object/picture itself.
However, JX is still unable to read words.
So lately, I tried to put up pictures of animals with the names of it.
JX doesn't appear interested in reading words yet
so I think it would take some time.
Nai Nai has been teaching JX songs (nursery songs, Christian children songs).
JX is able to sing the whole of "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star"
though diction isn't very clear. Haha.
JX is also able to sing the Christian version of the "Little Indian" Song.
Lately, JX would mumble or sing songs he has learnt.

JX can be rather rude to unfamiliar people -
he'll say "Don't like", "Go Door" or "Bu Yao".
It can be pretty embarassing when JX says that.
I've taught him several times not to say it
but JX still does it...
So I've to continue to teach him to love others.
Ok that's all for today...
Gotta cook maggi noodles before Mei Mei wakes up.

JX @ 20 mths old

2009-09-13T09:56:00.005+08:00

JX @ 20 months old
It has been some time since I blogged...
perhaps the last month of pregnancy had been very exhausting for me -
1. My father's hospitalisation for stroke
2.Sam's grandfather's demise
3.Sam had suspected H1N1 virus that resulted in both JX & I having to stay in ils place for two 'sleepless' nights,
4. Both JX & I having slight flu. And the worst was me having to go through the uncomfortable nasal swab test for H1N1.
Nonetheless, Thank God that despite of all the weariness,
I was able to deliver little baby Aletheia on 1st Sep 09.
If I do have some time, I'll probably narrate the delivery process in another post.
XXX
Alright now I shall blog about JX @ 20mths old
(wanted to post some pictures but unable to upload it into Blogger? Do take a look at FB if you're interested)
As dear little JX is approaching his Terrible Twos,
he has often been expressing his wants & dislikes - "Don't like, Don't want, Put Back, 不要etc."
When unfamiliar people want to carry him, he'll often say, "不要, 不要!"
When he wants to watch Videos (of Word World/Barney), he'll say, "Watch Video/Watch Television/看电视机". He'll then find the DVD that he wants to watch & try insert it into the DVD player. We would usually let him choose the DVD that he wants to watch since he knows the title of each video. We usually limit him to watching 2 videos (1 in the morn, 1 in noon).
Little JX also knows the title of all his books & he'll usually take out the book he wants me to read & say the title of it. As mentioned before, JX knows the last 1-2 words of each sentence in most of his English books so I'll pause for him to say it.
I've been reading to him books in Chinese as well. Similarly, he knows the title of each different stories. I would say that JX is bilingual! When he says an English word, he'll repeat the word in Chinese at times.
JX is able to distinguish different colors, different shapes (that include sector, ring, parellogram), different objects (that include towel, soap, mirror etc. etc.), different seasons (Spring, Summer, Autumn, Winter), different expressions/actions (happy, sad, angry, cry, excited, surprised, scared). Also knows mountain, river, sea, dessert etc.
(I taught him these from several books that Sam's mum bought from her previous China Trip. Thank God that JX is a very keen learner & he has a superb memory & ability to grasp/comprehend/associate.)
JX loves to PERFORM - he loves to talk, sing (able to mumble the tune of Twinkle Little Star), dance & act out the storyline when others read to him.
JX is bustling with energy most of the time. So, he gets very grouchy/cranky when he is overly tired. If possible, I'll usually get him to bed at 8pm as he needs about 45mins-1hr to wind down before he enters his slumberland. (However, sadly now, I have to juggle between breastfeeding newborn sibling & settling JX to sleep - it can be truly tough!)
JX's adjustments to a New Sibling:
I've been very worried about JX's adjustments during my labor, hospital stay & after.
Indeed, having a New Sibling is a Major Transition for him.
My MIL & my Mother had a very Challenging Night when I stayed in Hospital -
JX woke up from 3am-5am looking for Mummy & they had to play with him/sing songs till JX managed to sleep at 5am.
When JX visited me in hospital after my labor, JX didn't want me to hug him & I was truly sad.
But thank Lord that JX didn't cry or make a big fuss.
JX would at times say, "Don't like Mei Mei" or "Put Back" when he sees me breastfed (bf) baby. So we try our best to engage JX with other activities when I bf.
However, I noticed that JX appears to be rather disoriented these few days & his ability to focus has been somehow affected. Perhaps because his normal routine has been disrupted & his Mummy couldn't be around most of the time to teach him. So, he has to learn to play independently on his own. I felt sad.
(If only I can be torn into half so that I can both breastfeed newborn & spend time with JX)
Hence, I tried my best to settle JX to bed whenever I can & to play with him & read to him whenever I can. It has been exhausting.
As the first 6 weeks of breastfeeding is based on demand feeding (baby demands, Mummy feeds bb), I acknowledge that it is very tough for me to spend time with JX.
Furthermore, I'm still in my Confinement for 1mth which supposedly is the Month for me to REST.
As my mum couldn't take leave to help me out during confinement,
it had been rather taxing on Sam.
Haha at times, Sam became so disoriented in the middle of the night & thought that he had suffocated baby. I told him 2x before that baby was in the cot, not on our bed.
But I believe things will get better when breastfeeding becomes less demanding & baby feeds faster & at a longer interval.
I'll have more time for JX & Sam will be able to focus on his church ministries better.
Dear Christian Readers, do keep us in Prayers -
May God help us to adjust to a new baby in our family.
May God help JX to learn to love & be gentle to Mei Mei.
May God grant me lots of Strength to look after 2 children &
lots of patience & wisdom to discipline JX as he reaches 2yrs old.
May God grant Sam strength in serving God.
Thank YOU!

2009-08-06T00:02:00.002+08:00

Here's a pic of a Pregnant Me...
Hehe there are very few pictures of a pregnant me as I think I look horribly FAT when I'm pregnant. People will say it's ok to be Fat when you're pregnant But after giving birth, unkind words would usually arise if you don't lose those weight by the 6th month.
Haha...last year, when I managed to return to almost pre-pregnancy weight by the 11th mth,
I'm pregnant again SO I believe it would take me a longer time to reduce weight this time.
Please be kinder to me. ;)

While waiting for Sam to return home from the wake, decided to blog...
Had been wanting to blog about my struggles as a Mother of JX in church
as there's nobody I can share with besides Sam.
For the last 2 Sundays, I felt rather 'alone' in this church.
When I carried JX in my arms while he was sleeping in the church office,
I was just pondering how pathethic I am -
not able to attend service, nobody to help me or rather JX did not readily allow others to carry, not able to eat lunch when others are having their lunch,
so having to eat a cold plate of lunch left on the table by Sam for me,
feeding JX on my own while most have maids to feed their kids,
not able to communicate with others as I've to follow JX ard,
no peers whom can chat & share prayer requests with...
"How I wish I was at CBC" were thoughts that popped up.
At CBC, I've my Mum, my in-laws, Aunties who know me, my good friends, my youths...
seeemingly so many that might be able to HELP.
Perhaps I would be able to attend service & listen to sermons...
Perhaps someone would be able to help me feed JX while I have my lunch...
Perhaps I would have a close friend whom I can share my prayer requests with...
I wondered wbether I looked pathethic (as I thought of myself to be) in front of church members.
I just felt so ALONE.
I want to be independent so that Song En can focus on shepherding in this church
but yet I know I couldn't do it on my own at all!
I'm going to have another baby...how am I going to manage on my own?!!
While pondering about how pathethic I am...
God had been so Kind towards me even when I'm complaining.
On the 1st Sun, when I opened the office door after JX awoke from sleep,
God sent me 2 helpers...
there was this Auntie who saw that my lunch was still left on the table.
She told me to eat my lunch & that she would help to feed JX.
So, I was able to eat my lunch...though the noodles were cold & soggy,
I tried to complete everything.
The other lady was a Deacon...she chatted with us while we were eating.
I felt so comforted & a sense of warmth...
I felt so Thankful to God.
On the 2nd Sun, God gave me strength to look after JX while Song En was having Board meeting for 2 whole hours.
JX was able to sit quietly in his highchair while I fed him his lunch & while watching Barney, Thomas the Train.
It is indeed not easy for me.
At times, I just feel so alone.
Likewise, I think it would be even tougher for Mummy Pei En & Upsheep
when they bring their toddlers to mission field.
How I wish I could be in a comfort zone (in my case, CBC) where
there are so many people whom I know & could help me.
However, God has placed Song En & our family in another church.
So, once & once again, I've to have lots of Faith & Trust in God...
to keep me strong & give me strength & more strength & more strength
to look after 2 children & yet being able to support Sam in church ministries.
May God help me! May God send me helpers.
May God help me to open up & to ask for HELP.
Christian readers, do keep me in prayers.

2009-07-22T23:42:00.003+08:00

Now About JX's Mummy...

- In this pregnancy, I had gained more weight or rather the baby inside appears to be bigger. So, the weight has been pressing on the uterus & causing pain in my pubic bone. If I stand, sit, walk too long, my pubic bone will hurt. I've difficulties sleeping lately as well. If I lie to the side, my pubic bone will hurt. If I lie on my back, my back feels uncomfortable. But the pain is still bearable. =)

- With the lack of good sleep, I become exhausted easily. Ard 4pm, I would be too tired to look after JX & play with him. It would be a real challenge for me each time! At times, I would have to disturb Sam who would be working at home occasionally. I truly don't wish to interfere Sam in his work...but at times, weariness makes me too frustrated in looking after JX. I need a small break & some help.

- At times, I await for 6pm to arrive when Sam's father would bring our dinner & help out so that I could have a small time out for at least 1 hr. From 6pm-7.30pm, I would take a short break if Sam's parents are free to come.

- After JX's dinner & bonding time with his grandparents, Sam & I would prepare his bath, have bible story time, give him goodnight kiss & he'll enter into his slumberland by 8.30-9pm.

- After 9pm, it'll be a longer break for me. Watch TV, facebook...then have QT with Sam then sleep (if I could sleep...)

- Anyway, baby inside appears to be more active than JX last time when he was in my womb. Hmm...will she be more active than JX???... I wonder how will I be able to look after 2 Active Kids...

- In church, I know many people by face but do not have much opportunity to communicate with them yet as I've to look after JX. It appears that my role presently is to look after JX so that Sam can serve in Church ministries. As I'm unfamiliar with many of them & they're unfamiliar with me, the only family who usually helps me is Shi Mu & her daughter. So, I've got to be independent in looking after JX on my own. Most of the needs of the younger children in church are usually attended by their maids. E.g. the maids would bring the lunch in for the children & feed them. But for stay home mummies like me (w/o my mum, in-laws, Aunties who know me & could possibly help), I've to bao gao liao in this church. So, I've to feed JX his lunch before I could have mine. I've to run around with JX whenever he goes for his adventure around the small church premise. Imagine a pregnant Mummy following a little kid around. Haha. BUT I try to remain joyful & patient so that Sam could concentrate on his church ministries - preaching, teaching etc. I wonder how I'll manage when the next child arrives or how will I manage 2 crying children. May God pave a way for me. May God grant me more helpers for JX & may JX adapt better to others playing with him. May God help JX's sibling to be easily manageable.

- Alright...that'll be all for now. Readers, do keep us in prayers. May God grant me lots of strength & joy in looking JX daily.

2009-07-22T23:08:00.001+08:00

Sigh...something amiss in my blog so I couldn't put up pic or type normally. But I wanted to blog so here it goes...

A quick summary on JX:

- With increased mobility, JX doesn't like to be carried. So, if you carry him, he'll struggle his way out and wants to be put down.

- JX still enjoys reading books. I'm thankful that my mum-in-law had bought many Chinese books from the recent China trip she went. So, I had been reading to him in Mandarin. I would say that JX is bilingual.

- JX knows many words now. He knows how to differentiate & say different colors - red, blue, yellow, green, purple, pink, grey, black & white. He also knows shapes - rectangle, triangle, square, circle, diamond, sector, moon, oval, parallelogram, semi-circle.

- JX loves to Count! When he sees numbers or objects, he'll start counting. He still doesn't really know how to count but he loves to blabber 1, 2, 3, 4, ...

- JX has been a very active boy. At times, some ppl will find him 'Hyper' as he's always moving around & not pausing for a minute. Even my parents-in-law do not have the strength to look after him for very long. But I believe that he's active not to an extent that he's unable to focus. He's still able to sit down & listen to stories & learn new things.

BUT you all could imagine how busy & exhausted I am in looking after such an active boy!

- JX is small in built...or rather Lean or Lanky? Hmm...JX really can eat a lot BUT he's too Active to be FAT. In the morn, he eats 4 tbs of Nestum with formula milk (4Tbs of Nestum is almost equivalent to what an adult eats). Besides nestum+milk, he will eat 1-2 portion of fruits (like banana, prunes, kiwi etc.). Besides that, at times, he is able to eat a slice of bread/pau as well.

- JX's favorite food - Chives Dumplings (Gu Chai Jiao Zi), any types of Pau & most types of fruits.

- JX has been teething - 1st molars are out on his lower gums. It has been rather painful for him. So he's been drooling lots & biting his fingers.

That's all for JX for now. =)

Seeing the world in the eyes of a child

2009-07-08T21:24:00.002+08:00

Seeing the World in the Eyes of a Child
makes me pause to look at 'little' things I hardly took notice of before.
Little JX is an observant little boy with sharp sight & hearing.
He loves to look out for moon, stars and aeroplanes in the sky at night.
Several times, we were surprised that he could exclaim & point out those glowing/sparkling objects in the sky.
At times, we would dismissed what he had said as we couldn't see those objects
but would later realised that little JX was right.
Little JX would at times imitate the sounds of vehicles he heard at home.
At times, he would climb onto the sofa & peer through the window grilles
to see where the sound was coming from (e.g. the rubbish truck).
He would never fail to notice & be excited by "Cranes" along the road/expressway.
He would exclaim in delight "Crane" and add that it's tall, long, high (descriptions made in both Eng/Mandarin).
JX also loves to look out for aeroplanes, trains, bridges when he is in the car.
Lately, he has been very amused by "Escalators" & he would exclaim "Escalator, Escalator" whenever he sees one in the shopping mall.
Sam would let JX stand on the escalator while holding his little hands.
Little JX also enjoys listening to Music created by musical instruments.
Whenever he goes to Church, he would try to put his little fingers to the piano or the guitar.
Indeed, Seeing the World in the eyes of a Child
makes a difference!
Daily life can become such a routine that we fail
to look in awe at 'little' things around us.
Do we stop to look at God's creation - the Sun, Moon & the stars?
I didn't realise that Cranes can be SO TALL!...
till JX pointed that out to me.
Perhaps you may want to take a look at those Cranes beside the new skyscapers in the City which are still undergoing construction.
Crane gonna be built first before a building gets to be built.
Thank Lord that JX is such an observant little Boy!
Little as he is...
he is able to observe more things around the world than Me - an adult.
May God help me to understand JX better as
I try to look at the world in JX's eyes.

My Father's Close Shave with Death

2009-07-08T20:44:00.002+08:00

I thought he wouldn't be able to see JX's sibling
Prior to this post, I had written regarding the deterioration of my father's health
and two Sundays ago, we had to call an ambulance & get the medics to force my father to go to the hospital as he couldn't speak, eat and walk properly.
The soft approach didn't work for him -
we tried to persuade him to go to the hospital & he stubbornly refused to.
Even the medics tried the soft approach but they were not successful either.
SO, the medics said they had to use the hard approach which was to drag my father out of the house & put him on the stretcher.
My brother said that he only relented & stopped struggling after knowing that he was in the ambulance on the way to the hospital.
Thank God that we managed to get him to the hospital!
Neurosurgeon said that he had several blood clots in his head due to falls (my father had several falls) which had resulted in his lack of functionality/mobility.
And he needed to go for an operation the next morning.
According to my brother, the doc appeared to have confidence in doing the op as my father was not too old.
Doc said the op was necessary as he might suffer greater consequences (death) if he had another fall the next time.
I was rather shocked that my father's condition sounded so serious to the extent that he needed an op so urgently.
So, that night, I went to see my father in ICA (Immediate Care) for the 'final' time before his op.
Sam briefly mentioned the gospel and we prayed for him.
That night, I was thinking whether I would see my father again & whether he would get to see JX's sibling.
Perhaps due to the lack of information about my father's condition & the drastic deterioration of my father's health had resulted in my negative thinking?
Prayer was the only thing we can do.
The following day, we went to see my father after his op.
Doc had drilled 3 holes in his head to remove the blood clot
so my father had this "Manchurian" hairstyle.
Thank God that he Survived the operation & that he could speak slightly to us.
He could even complain to my mum & brother about his stay in hospital & that he was hungry.
In the next few days, my father had shown improvements in his speech, appetite & functionality.
At present, he could use his right arms for his meals & he could complete his meal.
In the past 3 months, my father's appetite had greatly decreased after a bad fall he had...
so, I'm happy to see that my father is eating well again.
My father is presently still residing in the hospital.
The nurses said that he would have to attend rehab so that he would be able to function independently first before discharge.
Therefore, he has to stay in the hospital for 1-2 weeks more.
Hopefully, he would be compliant and complete his rehab before discharge.
Thank God for his grace & mercy.
We will need to make the house more elderly friendly
so that falls could be avoided
& his blood clot in his head would not be aggravated further.
Thank you to close friends for your prayers.
May God help my father to accept Christ into his life
& lead an abundant life for Him.

25th June 2009

2009-06-26T20:24:00.003+08:00

25th June 2009
was my Father's 74th birthday
& also, Michael Jackson's last day on earth.
News of MJ's death was rather sudden
as he was such a distinctive figure - bizarre yet entertaining.
He was musically talented...
however all the sensationalized news about his life simply reflect a state of Confusion -
a life without God.
I won't elaborate further as this post isn't about MJ, but my father,
whose life somehow reflects sadness - a life without God.
25th June 2009 -
I noticed the deterioration of my father's health.
His previous heavy consumption of Alcohol added with his retirement (staying indoors daily) has taken a toil on his health.
It was the 1st time I noticed that his hands were shaky & he couldn't hold things properly, to the extent that he couldn't even eat his meals properly.
It was the 1st time he didn't pour a cup of drink for me when I came to visit.
It was the 1st time I heard from my mum that he couldn't manually wash the clothes.
He appeared much thinner as well...
Thankfully, he was still able to walk around.
My father is a rather stubborn old man
who refuses to acknowledge his retirement and his failing health.
He would rather keep to himself and stay indoors to avoid embarassment.
It is really sad to see him like that.
What is most sad is that he has not accepted Jesus Christ into his life
& his life has been filled with much bitterness and sadness.
Hence, he previously drank alcohol daily to suppress his bitterness.
Two months ago, my mil had shared the gospel with him
& supposedly, he agreed to accept Jesus Christ into his life.
With his failing hearing, I had some doubts about whether he could hear & understand what my mil was saying. Furthermore, he would often say "Ya, ya" even when he wasn't able to listen to the content of the conversation.
May God help my father to believe in Him.
On a positive side, I am thankful that we, including little JX could celebrate my father's birthday with a cake.
I am also thankful for the times I brought my parents & JX out to Tamp Mall/Century Square/Airport T3 two months ago (after dad's retirement & before my dad is unwilling to step out of house).
Hopefully, my father would have the strength to carry JX's little sibling in Sep 09.

Shepherding a Child's Heart

2009-06-23T22:23:00.003+08:00

Shepherding a Child's Heart
Lately, I've started reading again -
I've been reading a book 'Shepherding a Child's Heart' by Tedd Trip.
This precious book was given to me by dearest Pei Xuan last year.
According to Song En, this was a very good parenting book & he had also bought the same book
as he was unaware that Pei Xuan had given me this book the last time.
So, I had given this good book to dear Xiaomin.

I had read about 1/3 of the content of the book & found it truly beneficial.
"Parenting is shepherding the hearts of your children in the ways of God's wisdom"
In summary, this book discusses on deep biblical principals to the task of parenting & concentrating on what is going on inside a child rather than just their outside behavior.

Tedd Trip mentioned about 'unbiblical goals and methods' of parenting/childrearing.
Unbiblical methods that include behavior modification and punitive correction
which I previously thought was helpful due to societal experiences and my course of study in social work.
Indeed, I agree with Tedd Trip that such methods might not be effective in correcting the behavior for the long term. E.g. Parents not around to monitor the behavior or when parents remove the reward, the child would not have the incentive to perform the good behavior.
E.g. a child accepting grounding as a punishment as he/she has learnt to cope with it.
Such outward behaviors might not flow from the heart & true motives of the child.
SO, what are biblical methods to shepherd a child's heart in the ways of God???
I'll share with you more after I've completed the book. ;)

The primary thrust of discipline is not punitive, but correcting a child who has disobeyed God back to the path of obedience.
As mentioned in the previous post, I've been pondering about how & when should I discipline JX
as JX has started to be disobedient and throwing anger tantrums at times.
(All of us are sinners; certainly not excluding a baby who has started to disobey)
In what situations should I discipline him?
How do I discipline him? Spanking? Rebuking?
Thankfully this book has provided me with some biblical guidelines.
One important principal I learn was that discipline is NOT punishment/revenge/venting frustration or anger.
This was a good reminder for me because I realised that often, I would shout "No" & "Get out" to JX when I was frustrated and angry at him.
E.g. when he touched electrical switches or went into toilets to play those flushes & toilet seats.
Indeed, what I was doing wasn't disciplining JX, but venting my frustration on him...
& it isn't helpful at all.
Furthermore, I don't think these are much worthy issues for discipline either.
Hence, in the future, I'll reflect upon when I should discipline JX & keep check upon my feelings 1st so that I would avoid venting my frustrations at him.
What stems from JX's behavior?
Is it an act of disobedience to God?
Is it an act of disobedience to his parents?
"Do not withhold discipline from a child;
if you punish him with the rod,
he will not die.
Punish him with the rod
& save his soul from death... (Proverbs 23: 13-19)
We agreed to discipline JX through spanking his little palms when JX slaps others.
Also to rebuke him when he throws temper tantrums - stiffen his body, yelling, slap, bite, blow bubbles.
Such of JX's behaviors stem from anger, selfishness and much unlove.
Hence, an act of disobedience to God and his parents.
I will share with you more on the methods of disciplining the next time
after I have completed the book.
Reading this book has also reminded me that not all of JX's behavior require discipline
which previous experiences & familial expectations have contrary demonstrated.
E.g. I personally don't think that JX requires spanking on his palms when he touches the pavement or objects around the neighborhood when we bring him downstairs. It's perfectly normal for a curious toddler to explore his surrounding & using his little chubby fingers to touch the different textures of objects. We just got to clean his hands after the trip. (But I noticed that JX got rebuked & spanked before by YeYe due to his meer curiosity).
Henceforth, certain behaviors portrayed by JX that are deemed unacceptable by adults might Not necessarily be an act of disobedience But a growing up phase for him.
Alright that will be all for now.
May God help me & Sam to have lots of wisdom to shephered our child according to the ways of God. :)

2009-06-07T22:41:00.003+08:00

“潘师母”
Praise Lord that Song En is officially "颂恩传道/潘传道” in our Church today!
And that makes me 潘师母...LOL.
It feels really queer when 牧师 in our church introduced me with that status.
I think I would prefer if people calls me 佩玲 or Carol instead
as many church members are more senior than me.
Furthermore, this 潘师母 is not able to do much for the Church yet due to babycare.
I truly hope to be a support to Sam in his ministries...
so may God gradually put away my pride & comfort zone to be able to
communicate more to others.
Today, I'm very Thankful to 师母 for volunteering to look after JX so that
I'm able to attend church service.
It was the 1st time (ever since JX was born) that I was able to attend a full service
without needing to care for JX.
It was the 1st time I was able to sit & listen to a sermon attentively.
Thank Lord that JX is able to be without his Mummy for 2 hours
& he did not ask for his Mummy throughout.
师母even managed to give JX his lunch.
(Dear Mummy Carol was concerned so she went to check on JX quietly 2x w/o JX noticing. He appeared fine so I left quietly)
Hopefully, JX would be willing to stay in Sunday Class w/o Mummy soon
so that I'm able to attend service
& look after his baby sibling who will be coming out soon.
May God help JX to be an obedient boy - (lately, JX has learnt to slap/push others away when he is grouchy or upset. Both Song En & I had beaten his little hands and taught him not to do that. May God truly grant us wisdom to know how to discipline JX & may JX be an obedient boy)
My God use our Family greatly in this church.

2009-06-05T22:14:00.002+08:00

Month of May...
Month of Holiday, Treats & Outings...

JX getting into a Box. Loves to explore getting into & out of Boxes.
JX sitting on the Giraffe given by Uncle Zhi Yong & Auntie Jia Min for his 1st birthday

Papa & JX looking at an aeroplane

JX asleep on his stroller on the way back from Tamp Central

Above are just some Random pictures. I think I'll post more pictures on Facebook next time instead.
Anyway, Month of May is a pretty enjoyable month as PaPa is having his holidays
& so we are able to go for Outings - to the Zoo, East Coast Beach, Swimming etc.
Yay! I've Sam as a helper during his holidays so he does the cooking & feeding.

1. Treats & Yummy Food!!!
Yeah I'm thankful to be part of a pastor's family. LOL. One of the pros are we get Treats! Our family were invited for dinner treats from Churches as they wanted to treat those graduands upon their completion of their theological studies. So, dear Mummy Carol was able to enjoy delicious food!!! Besides getting treats, Sam & his classmates also gave dinner treats to their classmates who were going overseas upon graduation. Haha...I get to benefit nonetheless... ;)

2. Lots of Outing!
We brought our dear Jian Xin out rather frequently during the holidays as well. With a car, travelling has indeed become more convenient! We experimented 'outside' food for JX during those times we were out & unable to cook his meals. Hopefully, he would be able to accustom to a different variety of food soon.

3. Total Weaning
I would think 4th June (yesterday) would mark the date that JX was totally weaned off breastfeeding. I truly Thank Lord that total weaning off comes so naturally & without much protest from dear JX. We had gradually tried to wean off JX from his 1 day & 1 night feeding during the past 2 months. At times, when we brought him out at night, he would sleep along the way home & would 'forget' about night feeding. In the morning, when he awoke, we would tell him that we would prepare his breakfast when he requested for a feed. Thumbs up to Mummy Carol for breastfeeding JX for a total of 17 months! I would fondly remember those times with precious little JX.

4. JX's Great Memorising Abilities
In the previous post, I had mentioned that I was letting JX fill in the blanks for the last word in each sentence from his story books. Lately, JX is able to fill in the blanks for the last word/last 2 words in each sentence, not only for his story books, but for ryhmes, Children's Praise songs, The Lord's Prayer etc.

Here's an Example:
Our Father who art in _____ (Heaven), Hallowed by thy _____ (Name), Thy Kingdom _____ (come), Thy Will be _____ (done), On _____ (Earth), as it is in _____ (Heaven). Give us this day our daily _____ (bread). And forgive us our _____ (trespasses), as we forgive those who trespass against _____ (us). Lead us not into _____ (temptation). But deliver us from _____ (evil). For thine is the kingdom, the _____ (power), the glory, forever & ever. _____ (Amen).

(JX is able to say the last word of each sentence of the Lord's Prayer in Mandarin too).

He knows how to sing the last word of...God is so _____ (Good), God is so _____ (Good), God is so _____ (Good), He's so _____ (Good) to me.

JX surprises me each time when I pause to let him fill in the blank of the last word for Songs, rhymes (like Bah Bah Black Sheep) & books..."Wow I didn't know he actually could remember what I read or sang to him the last time!!!"

Two days ago (3rd June), I tested JX on his counting. I'm pleasantly surprised that he could say Number 1 to 10 (in both languages). I would say '1', then he would say '2', then I would say '3', he would say '4' etc. Then I would ask him to say '1', then I would say '2', then he would say '3' etc. Today, I tested to see whether he knows how to say numbers beyound "10" & he actually knew how to say from 11-19.

(Though JX's pronunciation for words isn't accurate yet, we could hear him attempting to mouth those words & their syllables.)

Yeah!!! We thank Lord for JX's ability to learn & memorise!!! Song En said that we should start to let him memorise biblical verses. At present, JX only knows "The Lord is my _____ (Shepherd)."

5. JX's sleeping issues
Hmm... JX's sleep hasn't been too good lately. Probably due to teething. He has been waking up in the dawn hours & unable to get back to sleep for an hour. So, he will crawl up to mummy & wants mummy to cuddle him back to sleep. So, obviously, I'm unable to sleep well either. May God help him to sleep better.

6. Preparation for the Next Sibling
Yep Mummy Carol has started to ponder about preparations. Dear JX is rather attached to his "Mummy" and usually it's Me who helped him to sleep. So, I'm rather worried about my labor day, hospital stay & days after the new sibling is out. Hmm...I wonder whether his grandparents would have the energy & strength to look after JX during my labor day & hospital stay. Lately, Ye Ye had mentioned at times he didn't have strength to carry JX & would pass to Nai Nai to carry. But Nai Nai appeared to be exhausted at times due to her stressful job. As for my mother, she would often tell me that she wasn't tired in carrying JX when I knew she would be (because JX is very active & fidgety). SO, I gotta start Praying!

Alright that will be all for now. =)

Simple Joys & Simple Contentment

2009-05-11T21:43:00.003+08:00

Living in Simplicity & Contentment (II)
(Part 1 post was dated on 23rd Dec '08)

It has been 1.5 years since I've been an unemployed or rather has been a non-paid Stay-Home-Mum. LOL.
As mentioned previously in my old post dated 23rd Dec '08,
I've been gladly living in prudency & contentment for these period of time.
Perhaps having lesser $$$ has taught me the lesson on living in simplicity & contentment.
I hardly harbor much thoughts of wanting material things for myself.

With the gradual depletion of my personal savings,
I guess I don't have much of a choice but to practice the art of prudence.
Lately, I realised that I pondered twice about purchasing stuff (like the Shampoo or bread) when I went to NTUC.
Wow a big bottle of shampoo cost $13-15...
since we still have the old Shampoo that we haven't used for a while,
why not finish that bottle 1st.
So in the end, I didn't purchase it.

Sigh at the start of my 2nd trimester, my sinus/bad running nose started up again...
Esp. these few days, I've been using 1-2 boxes of tissue within 3 days.
Hmm...Sam commented that I've been using too much tissue papers...
Furthermore, I'm using Kleenex tissues which is more costly than other brands.
I told Sam that my nose is rather sensitive & will itch if I used toilet paper...Hmm...
I was rather frustrated then but I realised that I truly had used too much tissues & it's really costly at the rate I'm using it...
haha...so I've to use lesser.

We didn't really bought much things for JX either.
The previous stuff I bought for him were books (Gingerbread Man, Lion & the Mouse, Field Mouse & Town Mouse - 1 for $3) & a small keyboard which cost $15.90.
JX enjoys those type of books & presently, I'll read to him & ask him fill in the blanks for the last word in each sentence.
E.g. I will read, "Once upon a time, there lived a girl with curly golden _____.
She was called _________. One day, she went for a walk in the ________. Soon, she became hungry & ________."
So, I will pause at the blanks & ask JX to read it out.
I don't think he can read the words yet but he remembers the story well.
As for JX's clothes, I hardly purchase it as well.
The last purchase was 3 T-shirts from FOX (Xiaomin recommended it).
Yep the price is reasonable & quality is soft.
I bought it as JX doesn't have many T-shirts with short sleeves.
Recently, Nai Nai also bought about 5 singlets & shorts for JX.
I'm glad that she did as JX's old singlets were worn out.

Actually when I'm out shopping with my mum,
she would at times remind me not to purchase some toys that I've intentions of buying.
Well, thanks for her reminders.
Thankfully, my mum has given JX many old Mac Donalds' toys that she had bought previously
through her many years of work.
So, we could save some $ on toys.

Special Thanks to Krystin & her daddy for giving me so many baby clothings for my 2nd child...Wow the next child would have so many new clothes to wear for the 1st 3-4 months of her life. I had reminded their grandparents not to purchase any more new clothes for the 2nd child due to Krystin's gifts.

In contrary to what most would have thought about doting grandparents, JX's grandparents actually don't purchase much material stuff (like clothes & toys) for JX as well (in which I'm thankful for).
So far, Ye Ye has bought only one mobile 'Fish' toy for JX from his China trip previously.
Nai Nai has bought him books, singlets &
a Big Pooh & an aeroplane.
Perhaps our generous Nai Nai would have wanted to purchase more stuff but
I'm glad that a very thrifty Ye Ye has often reminded her not to.
I'm thankful for that because it would have taught not only Jian Xin, but myself not to harbor for more & more material stuff.
Instead, Nai Nai & Ye Ye have taught him to save.
JX has a Fat Piggy Bank & both Ye Ye & Nai Nai would give him $1 gold coin to insert into the Piggy at times. Now, JX enjoys inserting $1 into his fat piggy.

As for myself,
I'm still wearing my old pair of Clark shoes that was bought in 2007.
I wanted to purchase a new pair this year but couldn't get the color & size I wanted
so in the end, I didn't purchase any.
I bought some maternity clothings for the New Year.
Lately, bought a blue maternity dress which I wore for Sharon's wedding & Sam's graduation photo shoot.
Guess I'll need to wait for 2010-2011 before I could fit into my previous slim clothings again.
I'll need to give myself more time this time...haha...
also to factor in the need to be more bulky due to breastfeeding of the next child.

Wow...guess I've babbled too much about purchases till it sounds like I'm bragging about how prudent I am.
Actually, I'm still learning to be prudent. Haha...I think I still lose out to Sam & PJE on that.
I'm truly not as wise as both brothers on prudency & saving.
But what I learnt is to live in simplicity & contentment.
Perhaps with 'lesser' thoughts/harbor for stuff
may make you a happier person...
knowing that God knows all our needs & will provide us with all we need.

Are you living in Contentment?
Or are you harboring for more than what you 'need'?
Would it make you a happier person if you truly got all that you wanted?
God knows our every need & you wouldn't be in lack. =)

Struggles of being a Stay At Home Mum

2009-05-02T12:06:00.003+08:00

Struggles...

Being a stay-at-home mum of a toddler, there are so many things that I miss greatly. I miss serving in Church, fellowships, going out with church friends on Sat/Sun, sharing prayer requests & praying with each other. I miss working with youths & teaching them. I miss writing assessment reports. I miss communicating/counselling with others. I miss having colleagues. Haha I think my ex-colleagues would 'suan' me for saying I miss writing reports...previously, we could have as many as 30-50 reports to submit in each month. But I truly do miss writing & working with people.

My life appears rather simple right now. Everyday is about Spending Time with Jian Xin. However, it truly isn't as 'simple'. Each day is a busy day for me as well. So, I won't have the time to dwell upon things I missed (as mentioned above).

In this road of motherhood, I struggled much greatly with lack of faith & trust in God in the midst of much physical weariness. Previously, Jian Xin couldn't sleep well at night due to much reliance of nursing to sleep. Thus, I'm exhausted despite a non-pregnant status then. Presently, he is able to sleep so much better with the weaning of night nursing. However, being pregnant & having a low placenta (in which doctor advised against strenuous activities & carrying heavy stuff), it has been equally or even more exhausting looking after a very active Jian Xin who doesn't sleep from 1pm-8pm.

Certainly, there are times when I complained. Complained to Sam why there is nobody who could help me out - Sam has to go to school till 6pm, Sam's retired father & working mother only come from 6pm-7.15pm, my mother has to work & can come only on off days. There were times I would complain to Sam that I couldn't manage & would need HELP due to physical weariness (yet knowing that Nobody is able to physically help me out due to their commitments). Hence, I would complain even more & be rather bitter towards the lack of help I received. Those were times I would be less tolerant, loving and patient towards Jian Xin whenever physical weariness & frustration sets in. "HELP" is my bitter complaint. I've to be reminded by Sam each time to PRAY & TRUST in God to grant me the strength & ability to look after Jian Xin my own.

I believe with the arrival of a 2nd child, I would face this struggle even more. With my own limited ability & strength, I don't think I am able to carry on. However, I've to overcome this struggle of mine! I want to be a loving, joyful & patient mother to both my kids. It would be most ideal if our parents could help out at times. However, I've to acknowledge that there would be limited help available since our parents have their commitments as well. I find it rather selfish if I ask my mother to give up her job just to help me out (if she truly enjoys her job). It would be just as selfish if I ask Sam's parents to give up their leisurely, retirement dreams as well.

This is both Sam & mine choice for me to stay home to be the main caregiver for my kids. So, I've to find the Strength & Ability given by God to me as a Mother. I cannot do it on my own; but with God, I believe I can. God's love has graciously led such an ungraceful mother for 16 months.

Besides these struggles, I would soon be facing expectations as a Pastor's Wife. I truly don't know how would God use this lousy personality of mine... Hmm I shouldn't even have written this right; being a pastor's wife who should be a spiritual role model. Being out of touch with so many things (people, fellowship) at present, I feel so incompetent to be of support to Sam & church ministry. To be honest, my relationship with God is not in a good state at all. I need to work on it first and foremost. May God help me.

It has been a long while since I wrote such reflections. I hope by writing, I would be reminded of things that I should work upon. Yep being a Pastor's wife, I know that I should be a spiritual role model...but I'm also just a human with frailities. I struggled & am struggling. May God help me to trust more and more in Him.

2009-04-26T14:48:00.002+08:00

JX @ 15mths, turning 16 mths in 3 days time

He's able to walk officially at 15th mth old
& is presently walking everywhere in the house.
He knows how to say many words now
though his pronunciation for some words is still unclear.
His memory is superb!
He remembers the bible character "John" & "Mary" etc. in this particular bible story we have.
JX loves BOOKS more than toys.
I've read to him all his books - Little Red Riding Hood, Gingerbreadman, etc. etc.
umpteem times & he's learning how to mimic words that I read from the books.
JX appears to have a rather "gan chiong"/tense personality...
think besides his Mummy, Books & Soothing Music helps to calm him down.
He doesn't say Hi Or Hello Or Bye as readily when we ask him to do so...
well I just got to accept that he is a human; not a robot...
So he has a choice on whether to say it or not.
His new game which he invented is hiding jigsaw puzzles under his mattress & exclaiming in surprise "Where? Where?"
He has also learnt to Press "8" and "1" in the lift.
JX is VERY active...has transited to 1 nap per day...
so after his 1st nap from about 1pm, he's awake & walking around till 8pm (before he rest for the night),
dear Mummy Carol has to spend time with him.
It can be very tiring for a Pregnant Me.
Thus, I appreciate very much when my parents or my ils or someone would come over to help me at times.
Many who see JX would say that he's "thin" (Mandarin)...
I seriously have no idea why he's lean despite his good appetite & his ability to pass motion 2-3x per day.
So I can't answer "Why"?
I would postulate it to genes of smaller build (from both families), breastfeeding, not drinking formula milk yet, JX being so active, high metabolism rate...?????
I'm doing my best to feed him proper, healthy meals.
Hmm he's still in the average weight level & is growing taller...
he's generally healthy...so I shouldn't worry too much either.
Lastly to add,
most likely JX will have a Sister (from the 1st scan).
So now, I'm gradually preparing JX that he has a little"Mei Mei"
inside my tummy.
May God help JX to love his little sister.
As for me, I'm trying to enjoy the time spent with JX alone as an only child.
Not thinking too much ahead about the struggles of looking after 2 children on my own.
Just gotta take a leap of Faith & Trust in God to lead me through!

2009-04-01T21:49:00.002+08:00

Apologies Readers for being too lazy to blog for the past few weeks.
I've been spending more time on Facebook & watching Boys Over Flowers instead.

1. The Weaning Process
During the March Holidays, Sam & I decided to begin the weaning process for JX.
The 1st 3 days were truly tough -
JX cried so badly as I refused to feed him during his 1st nap.
He cried so miserably that I cried in heartache as well.
During the middle of the night, JX woke up several times wanting to nurse to sleep.
So, I've to carry him on my shoulders to pat him back to sleep
& endure his on-off cries throughout the night.
Persistence & Perseverance is the key to weaning.
Praise Lord that JX got accustomed to only 2 feeds per day now.
He doesn't need to nurse to sleep for naps & also in the night now!
He is sleeping so much better now & he is able to sleep for longer intervals.
I truly give THANKS to God for this, which I truly thought it was impossible to do so.
I'll gradually wean him off totally in Apr/May.

2. Being a Patient & Loving Mother
is something I struggled with.
There were times I would say unkind words to JX
during times of frustration due to lack of sufficient rest.
JX has been touching/pressing electrical appliances
& there were times when I became frustrated when he did not listen when
I told him "No".
May God teach me to be a better mother.

3. Feelings of Isolation
Being a Stay-At-Home Mother & especially with a 'never keep in contact with others'
attitude means Carol sees Baby & Baby sees Carol daily.
Besides regular SMS from Sam, Xiaomin, Krystin,
nah Carol hasn't make the effort to sms anybody else...sounds so lazy & emo hor.
Yeah Yeah Yeah...
I know I need to do more.
I need to start making new friends in Church & begin caring for others.

4. A bright JX gives me JOY
JX is truly good with words & he learns words quickly.
Last Sun, he watched Thomas & Train in church & he was able to say Edward.
It has really been amusing to see him speaking
& Praise Lord that he has taken many steps lately!

That's all for now.
I need to do some household chores now.
Will update on JX soon. & will put up his pictures.

2009-03-05T11:29:00.003+08:00

Jian Xin & Me
My dear little son has been conversing with us through words lately.
He speaks rather loudly, so I think he has probably inherited Sam & YeYe's loud voice.
He knows how to say his name "Jian Xin...ah".
Lately, he will pass me his toys/boxes & ask me to "Open" for him.
It's truly enjoyable to hear him communicating with me through words now!
His curiosity has resulted in him wandering to forbidden places like switch boxes, electrical appliances, corners with sharp edges etc.
So often, we have to tell him "No, No" & at times, he will mimic us & say "No, No".
There are times he will look at us, grin cheekily & continue touching those forbidden stuff...
then we would have to carry him & pull him away.
Jian Xin has this cheeky & playful streak in him (Nai Nai said that next time, he will be a cheeky, playful little boy)
It appears that Jian Xin isn't too interested in toys...no toys has captured his attention for more than 5 mins.
Instead, he prefers picking out books from the storage box with all his books.
He will pass us books he has picked out & asked us to read it for him.
xxx
Now About Me!
I've been just as exhausted as ever with insufficient rest...
but God's Grace is forever sufficient for me
as I get by each day with new strength & joy.
There are many occasions I struggle with weariness when JX is most energetic.
How I wish he could take his nap so that I could rest!
Often it never happens so.
So, at times, I will lie on his play mattress while he plays with his toys/books.
JX is truly very active...
He doesn't rest/sleep easily...
probably inherit my inability to sleep easily...
How I wish I could sleep easily!
xxx
Let's move on to the Church I'm presently attending.
So far, Huiping, Pastor Cheam, Rev Teo & Mrs Teo have came to our church.
They do not have a cry room
so most of the time, I'll be in a classroom where children & toddlers have children's worship & sunday class during service time.
Therefore, I miss service all the time.
I'm hoping for the day when JX will be able to attend the Toddler's Sunday Class on his own so that I can attend service.
In the church, there is no fellowship except for the youths.
No prayer meetings yet either.
Nobody shares prayer request yet either...
...my spiritual life is in a rather bad state!...
No fellowship, no bible study,
I try to do QT though...
Pray...I still do certainly!
Thank you to Krystin who is assigned to be our prayer buddy -
at least I can share my prayer request with someone & to pray for others,
something I used to do so much in CBC.
Being new to church, I certainly couldn't find any peers whom I can communicate with.
Actually, there are close to NO similar age peers in this church.
Those mothers who have toddlers appear to be older than me.
There is a lady, Yi Yi (Sam's classmate's wife) who is currently attending our church.
I can communicate with her...however, after her husband's graduation from SBC,
they will be returning to NZ in May.
Well...I guess I wouldn't be able to do much for the handful of youths in church till 4years later
when JX & his sibling can be rather independent of Mummy
& be accustomed to the Aunties & Uncles in church.
I await for that day -
to worship, to serve in Church, to teach, to pray, to love & to care.
How I miss so much -
fellowship with all its prayer support, bible study & outings.
So for those who have fellowship,
do treasure what you have & attend it with Joy!
But for now, I seriously need to reflect & repent from the rather bad state of spiritual life I'm in.
May God help me to continue equipping myself spiritually till
the Day comes when I can serve God again.

Latest Updates of Jian Xin

2009-02-24T13:04:00.002+08:00

Latest Happenings of Jian Xin

Praise Lord for Jian Xin's good health & increasing appetite & hence weight gain!

He is improving his verbal skills & is learning to converse with us through words.

Latest Words He Loves:

"Lizard" - Once, he was so amused by a lizard he saw on the kitchen ceiling, he started pointing & laughing at it. After that day, he would keep looking at that spot & say "Zard...zard".

So, at times, we would ask him where is Lizard, then he would crawl to the kitchen, stand up, point & shout "Zard, Zard".

"Crane (construction site Crane)" - Previously, I mentioned before that he was fearful of the sounds emitting by Crane about 3 months ago. Now, he likes Crane.

Once, he saw a crane between 2 HDB blocks of flat (@ a distance away) when peering through the window, he shouted "Crane, Crane". My mother was amazed at his sharp eyesight. On another later occasion, he did the same thing, exclaiming "Crane"...I was amused to see the Crane at the same position.

Lately, he would also exclaim "Crane, Crane" whenever he saw one during car rides.

"Windmill/Pinwheel" - We bought one of those common multi-colored windmill for JX. So, we taught him that it was called a Windmill. He would say, "Windmill" whenever he sees one.

"Coconut" - We brought him for a walk in Tampines Park Connector one day. He was looking at coconut trees & we taught him those were coconut. Along the way back, he kept saying "Nut, nut". Lately, we went to the cemetery for Shao Mu & he was shouting "Nut, nut" when the rest were praying. Nai Nai was so surprised that JX knew what was coconut.

"Bread/bun bun" - JX will say this when he wants to eat.

"Banana" - JX loves banana & will say "Na Na' when he wants to eat it.

Other Words JX knows how to say:

Balloon, Ball, Cat/Mao, Bo Bo (Uncle), Pong Pong (Bath), Messy (for Mr. Messy's shirt),

Eee...Zhang Zhang (dirty)

Words he can relate to but might not be able to verbalise it yet:

Various Body Parts, some animals etc., Seven Seas, Chocolate

Actions:

Combing his hair with a comb,

Tilting his head to smile,

Saying Cheese to camera,

Kok Kok Head (saw him deliberately knocking his head slightly & saying Kok Kok before; but this is an action we dis-approve.),

Touch his head & say "Tong, tong" (we taught him that his head would Tong, Tong when he knock his head),

Crawl to his high chair when he wants to "mum, mum" (eat),

Crawling to the sofa, standing on it, climbing on top of the sofa to peer out of the window to

see the dustbin truck etc. He's rather K-Po. Whenever he hears the sound from the dustbin collector truck, he will go the window.

When we say want to go Gai Gai, he will stand & raise his hands up, wanting us to carry him.

He will put the phone to his ears & listen.

He will raise his hand & say "Dao" at times whenever we ask "Where is Jian Xin?"

He will say "Gong" when he sees Tang Chong Rong Mu Shi's face on a magnet at our fridge (think he knows that old man is "Gong Gong")

Ok that's all for now...Will add pictures another day...

Lastly & Most Importantly,

Jian Xin Can STAND ON HIS OWN! He finally has the Confidence to stand on his own.

He stood up on his own last Sun & clapped his hands during children's worship.

2009-02-05T11:42:00.004+08:00

Jian Xin @ 1 year - 13months old
with new hobbies & interests

Hello Readers, Jian Xin has recovered almost completely from his bad bout of flu.
Lately, Sam & I both got the flu bug but we are thankful that Jian Xin did not caught the flu virus from us this time. If he got it, it would be his 4th consecutive bout of flu.

As he has recovered, we've allowed him to try more variety of food.
We've also changed the recipe of our porridge to something simpler but tastier.

Alright will keep it short & jump straight to the pictures.

Hobby 1: Climbing on Sofa & lazing on it/
standing up & peering out of the window/
trying to take down his windmill

Hobby 2: Lazing on his Mattress

Hobby 3: Waiting at the Gate/Looking @ neighbor's Plants

Jian Xin in his Red Chinese Costume on CNY (bought by Nai Nai)

Nai Nai Reading a Story to Jian Xin

JX loves hearing stories

The Cuckoo Clock from Ye Ye's House is now at our Place

Jian Xin had a bad fever then...so we placed a cooling gel on his forehead
as he didn't like us sponging him.

This is how he looks now... with his longer fringe & reddish highlights on his hair

Oh he dislikes wearing cap...but I'll put it on for him on sunny days (using distraction methods)
Yep, it's not sunny at home but we wanna capture him with his cap on.

Jian Xin still enjoys chatting as usual
& he is really good at mimicking words...
& he learns new words really quickly.

2009-01-24T21:27:00.002+08:00

JX IS A HAPPY BOY!
On a happier note, dear little JX seems better in health...
He still has cough with phelgm but he's Happy & Smiley & Cheeky.
JX has been very chatty & very expressive lately...
probably inherited those chattiness from Sam & PJE.
His favorite Call Outs include...
Ma Ma, Mi Mi (he loves to call out for me as & when he feels like it)
Clock, Cuckoo
Bit (stands for Rabbit. Lately, he has been seeing lots of Rabbit/Bunny on Baby Channel)
Ball, Duck, Car, BaNaNa, joNAH (whenever he sees them)
BYE (says this loudly few minutes after visitors leave/after I close the door)
His eyes light up & search around when I ask him where is
Papa, PoPo, Nai Nai, Shu Shu or Noah Bo Bo.
He loves snuggling up to me & sitting on my lap while reading, playing, watching TV.
I guess little JX really loves Mummy a lot.
He's really playful...he loves to wrestle with Mummy...sitting on my neck, body etc.
though I've to take extra caution now.
JX dislikes certain screeching sounds esp. if it's unfamiliar.
He dislikes the sight of the black Crane (those you see in construction site) & the sounds it make.
JX is Mr. Tickle because he gets ticklish rather easily.
E.g. he will touch Jia En Shu Shu's toes & giggle (did it before),
he will giggle in delight when he sees PaPa hitting a cockroach with a newspaper,
he will also giggle when you point at a little black dirt & repeat words like Eee...Zhang Zhang.
Ok that's all for now...will post more pic next time.

2009-01-21T18:31:00.004+08:00

Last 2 days, I was very depressed in spirits.
Dear Little Jian Xin appears to have inherited
our bad genes of sensitive nose/lungs...
so Doc said that it would take him longer to recover from flu.
Jian Xin has altogether 3 bouts of flu since the return from Batam trip.
Last Thu-Sun, he had ongoing fever & was rather moody.
He had since recovered from fever but is currently having cough (with phelgm).
He was not cooperative in taking his medication for the last 2 days
& as parents, we were worried that it would worsen his condition.
We pray that his condition wouldn't worsen & that he wouldn't inherit our (Sam & mine) childhood asthma condition.
Due to his 1-month bout of flu, his appetite is affected
& he has not been gaining much weight.
It truly pains me to see him being thin...
esp. with the addition of so many reminders & yet more reminders that Jian Xin has become much thinner from his once chubby self.
He hasn't been sleeping well at night either...
& I'm so very exhausted that at times, I complain that I don't have the energy to carry on...
But yet, God's Grace is indeed Sufficient
for I still managed to get by each day.

Thank Lord for uplifting my spirits today!
Today Sam bought a new toy for JX (we hardly buy toys for him)
& bought me Potato Cum Ham Bread & Egg Tarts (told him to buy these along his way home).
Wow it's been 1 year since I ate my once favorite Potato Cum Ham Bread.
These few days, I've been getting some food stuff that I feel like eating
when I bring baby for stroll downstairs -
Mee Pok Noodles, Laksa, Chicken Rice etc.
Hmm...dear maid usually cooks Rice Cum Same Fish Cum Vegetables for lunch
so I've been craving for other food (probably due to pregnancy as well).
Today FIL brought over the Cuckoo Clock from their place to ours
because we needed a clock.
Jian Xin is very amused with the Cuckoo Clock...haha.
I think the Cuckoo Clock looks really fitting in our house.

Anyway, thank you everyone for your encouragement in my new pregnancy...
Actually, I hardly have time to think about this new baby inside me
because Jian Xin has been sick & I've been so tired & preoccupied.
I just couldn't have this privilege of 'taking gentle care' of myself
unlike the 1st pregnancy...
I still have to carry JX, do everything as per normal...LOL.
But I believe God will help protect this baby.

Please continue to keep Jian Xin's health in prayers.
May I learn to TRUST & TRUST MORE in GOD daily!

Thank YOU!

Psalms 139

2009-01-15T10:31:00.004+08:00

Psalms 139

13 For you formed my inward parts;
you knitted me together in my mother’s womb.
14 I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
Wonderful are your works;
my soul knows it very well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you,
when I was being made in secret,
intricately woven in the depths of the earth.
16 Your eyes saw my unformed substance;
in your book were written, every one of them,
the days that were formed for me,
when as yet there was none of them.

I'm rather apprehensive when people (in particularly, legitimate married couples) exclaimed that a pregnancy was by accident (yi wai in Mandarin) or unplanned for.

Perhaps only in mere humanly view, these occur.

However, in Psalms 139,

we learn that each of us are intricately made by God.

Every child is made in accordance to God's Will & Purpose.

Many "plan" to have a child; but not every person would have one.

Many "plan" not to have a child (through contraceptives/Family Planning Methods);

but not every person would succeed.

For everything Happens in God's Will & Control.

Hereby, I shall announce of God's Will that I conceived again in Dec 08.

If God grants, another addition into our Family would arrive in end Aug 09 or early Sept 09.

JX & the latest addition will be 20 months apart but 2 calendar years apart...

(Dong Dong & Nuo Nuo were 18 months apart).

It's indeed God's plan for Mummy Pei En & Mummy Carol to conceive once again at such a close interval to the first child.

Sam & I didn't 'plan' to have another so soon because we hope to spend more time with JX

but we didn't actively 'plan' to prevent as well.

But as mentined above, at times,

God's plans far transcends humanly plans.

Initially, I felt rather stressed up because the thought of looking after 2 young kids can be rather scary!

At times seeing Little Dong crying endlessly for Upsheep while he is leading worship/speaking sermon & Pei En has to hold Little Nuo & at the same time, hushing Little Dong...seems all so Scary.

Arrgh...how am I going to handle this alone in the new Church next time. (*stressed*)

On the other hand, Mummy Pei En has been such an excellent Mummy

& has been a good role model for me.

She is calm & always carries a smile.

When she heard that I was pregnant (from my Mum),

she had been encouraging...she said that some people might say that our children's ages are very close...but there are pros about having another child sooner as well.

She said that Little Dong loves Little Nuo. (So Sweet)

If it's God's Will to grant me 2 children, I should be Thankful.

Perhaps it is God's plan for me to learn to entrust all cares & worries to Him.

Readers, I give you the authorisation to share this news whenever necessary.

Instead of remarking that "I'm pregnant again so soon!?";

why not just keep me, JX & baby in prayers.

I would gladly appreciate prayers more than anything else.

2009-01-09T15:50:00.003+08:00

Before people start thinking Carol is getting too 'emo',

I believe I should start writing some light-hearted post.

XXX

Anyway, Thank Lord & thank you for prayers!

JX has 90% recovered from his bad bout of flu.

No oozing of yucky mucousy discharge from his nose...

& we don't have to feed him with those medicine any longer.

His appetite has increased & he is eating more & passing lots of motion.

He has really been a good boy - not complaining even though he has been eating fish for almost 3 weeks (My mum said that he couldn't eat chicken/some fruits due to his bad phelgm).

XXX

JX knows how to call my mother "Ma Ma" (with the different pronunciation from Ma Ma - Me)

& he knows how to call Sam's mum "Nai Nai".

Both grandmothers are definitely very delighted! LOL.

It appears that JX might be rather faster in the verbal language area.

He knows how to say Bird, Car/Che, Star, Mao (Cat) whenever he sees them.

He has learnt how to say "Bye" as well.

As for motor skills, he is like most average children.

So I believe he might start walking only at 13 months onwards.

But it's perfectly fine...I heard crawling is good for the eye-hand coordination.

Presently, he expressed his needs much clearer too.

E.g. he will nod his head when I ask him whether he wants to eat bread.

XXX

Queerly, he likes the color Black...when I ask him where is Black color, he will find a black object.

He knows how to comb his hair, roar like a lion, put on his cap, make the twinkling action when sing Twinkle Little Star as well.

He also knows some of his body parts - eyes, nose, hands, feet.

It's really amazing how much JX could comprehend our language now.

XXX

Lately, he loves biting & licking his parents' faces.

However, both PaPa & MaMa do enjoy this affectionate time when he tries to attack our faces.

It's really ticklish whenever he tried to bite/lick us. LOL.

So, we usually roar in laughter & amusement more than crying for help.

XXX

Here's our Present Ideal Daily Schedule:

7am: JX wakes up, plays, eats breakfast

10.00am: JX takes 1st nap

11.30am: JX wakes up, plays

12.30-1pm: JX has lunch

1.15pm: JX has his bath

2.00pm: Mummy brings JX for a stroll (45mins)

3.30pm: JX takes his 2nd nap

5.00pm: JX wakes, plays

5.30pm-6pm: JX has dinner

7.00pm: JX has his bath

8.00pm: Lights Out - prepare to sleep.

By 9.00pm: JX asleep.

10pm-11pm: Mummy watches Yi Zhi Mei on Channel U. :)

XXX

Bye...need to take a short rest before starting to cook his dinner.

2009-01-08T10:44:00.002+08:00

"The Path of a Pastor's Life is Lonely"

Song En once told me that we've to be prepared for a rather lonely life as 'pastor'...

It's something I couldn't really comprehend because

I always see so many church members caring for our Mu Shi, Mu Shi Niang & their family.

During JX's 1st birthday celebration, I mentioned to Mu Shi Niang that I miss our Chinese congregation & she commented something akin to being prepared for pastors' lives to be rather gu dan...

Hmm... I still couldn't really comprehend this notion.

Why would a pastor's life be lonely?

Song En explained that probably

pastors have to shoulder many responsibilities on their own

& at times they couldn't share openly with church members

about their deepest concerns or worries.

Pastors' sharing openly about one's worries or others' problems

can be a rather foolish action.

The art of keeping confidentiality & secrets is something pastors have to practice.

Seemingly, it's indeed difficult for pastors to find close friends whom they can

confide their deepest thoughts/problems with.

I'm happy that Song En has his dearest brother, Jia En

who would be his closest confidante in his life (besides me of course).

Till now, I couldn't totally comprehend the above notion

because I've not experienced it yet.

However, leaving old church for a new ministry ahead has given me

an experience of how a pastor's life can be a rather lonely life.

Nonetheless,

we still Thank Lord for his abiding presence & Heavenly friendship in our lives

despite of the loneliness we may face.

Keep me in prayers

2009-01-05T14:25:00.002+08:00

Prayer Request for FAITH & TRUST in GOD

Yep...I need prayers for MORE & MORE Faith & Trust in God.

So if you happen to be a Christian Reader who is reading my blog,

please pray for me & keep me in prayers.

I'm coming to terms with an 'event' that God has placed in my life.

As I'm coming to terms with this reality,

it means I'm not ready to share openly with you readers yet.

When the time is Ready,

I would probably share with you all.

Why am I coming to terms with it?

I'm rather fearful, worried & stressful...

My stresshold level has decreased very much

since I've became a Stay-At-Home Mum...

I can become very stressed & edgy easily...Sigh.

Probably my walk in my Spiritual Faith hasn't been good either,

therefore, I'm more easily stressed & worried.

Despite all, God is good & His Will is good all the time.

Probably He wants me to learn to TRUST more in Him than myself.

May God help me to have more Faith & to Trust in Him.

Jian Xin @ 1 yr, 5 days old

2009-01-03T10:06:00.007+08:00

Month of December

Our Holiday Overseas...

Jian Xin's Increasing Chattiness...

Jian Xin's Baptism...

& significantly, Jian Xin's 1st Birthday!

New Words JX can SAY:

Baby, Clock, Nai Nai, Star, Car

New Words JX KNOW:

Piglet, Tigger, Sonic Wheel etc. etc.

Mummy Carol ordered for JX a Pooh Cake with all the Disney Characters that he was familiar with. It's a 3kg cake that cost $135.

Just in case, you're wondering who's that 'Sudoku'...not to worry, that's ME...
It's a tunnel game for JX...Find Mummy...

Papa Messy & Baby Messy...both really so MESSY!!!

JX with his new cap...

JX: I'm Baby Mr Messy

JX: I'm Baby Pastor JX

JX likes to climb onto sofa
JX baptised by Rev Meide on 21st Dec 08
JX's Favorite Fruit - Pear

JX helping with the laundry

Jia En Shu Shu would come over regularly to play with JX

JX @ Batam...looking amusingly at Uncle Chun Ming

JX & Baby Estelle (@2.5 months apart)

JX (a day before haircut) with Auntie Kaiqi

Mummy placed a clip on JX's fringe cos' it's too long...Pretty Boy

JX @ Plaza Sing...avid reader

JX with his loved Po Tou (great grandmother)

Can the world be a kinder world?

2009-01-01T11:09:00.002+08:00

"Thinner Baby = Incompetency as a Mother"

This notion has very much perturbed me
especially when Baby Jian Xin has lost much of his baby chubbiness & grown more to look like a toddler.

Jian Xin had indeed lost some weight after refusing to eat a different porridge (cooked by an Auntie) during our 1 week trip to East Malaysia

& thereafter suffering from a bad flu for 2 wks plus after the Batam trip.

He is still having bad running nose...:(

What pains a Mother most is

to see their child sick...

however, the world out there isn't a very kind world...

adding to the pain a mother has.

This notion/stereotype in my title above has been ringing in my mind as a result of previous comments (or rather gossip) given by some Aunties & even closed ones about
a Friend (whom I look up to).
Gossips:"Baby now thinner, never look after baby well...don't know how to look after baby."
I felt rather upset by the unjustified & hurtful remark towards my friend.
If those gossipers were Mothers,
how could they still ever make such insensitive & hurtful remarks to discredit the competency of a Mother just because of the physical appearance of her child?!!!
Is effective parenting just based on child's physical appearance?!!!
If so, many parents would have failed.
Does a Fatter Baby = Healthier Baby?
I felt that my Friend is a Great & Competent Mother!

I'm happy that her child is growing healthy & well right now.
Do you think all Mothers will persevere in breastfeeding given its difficulties at the start?
NO! But she did.
Breastmilk is the Perfect Meal we can give to our child!
Hmm...for those without much prior knowledge to child's development,
baby's weight gain will be more gradual after 4th month especially for breastfed babies
& babies would have to lose some of their baby's chubbiness so that they will be able to stand/walk.

I wonder if anybody is gossiping about me right now???

when Jian Xin has lost much of his old chubbiness.

Sam said that I view other's opinions too much...

& he added that if anyone did gossip about me being a lousy mother,

God would vindicate for me...haha.

I never wanted Jian Xin to be sick & to be thin!

I always give him 3 proper meals whenever I can...

I always assist him to have 2 naps if possible...

Yet...

some people question me, "Why did Jian Xin lose so much weight?"

as though it's something that I've done really wrong...

(certainly, I don't deny that there are those who ask with genuine concern which I'm thankful for).

I wonder whether they will gossip about me like

how they gossiped about my friend?

Such hurtful gossips...

Perhaps these thoughts are unfounded

but it may be founded as well -people can be so judgemental...

Well, guess I can't stop them from doing so even if it really happens...

May God keep me strong & positive

to guard myself from all those unpositive gossips that might arise now or in the future

(especially as a to be Pastor's wife).

Song En said that people would always have higher expectations of Pastor & their family...

so they might offer more criticisms...more gossips...more negative remarks...

I've to endure & tolerate & be strong

so that I can protect little Jian Xin

& raise him up in a positive environment.

May God help Jian Xin to recover soon!!!

May I learn to trust in God more & more...

Contentment in Simplicity

2008-12-23T21:07:00.004+08:00

Contentment in Simplicity...

That sums the life I've right now.

Being a Stay-At-Home Mother

& Song En being a student,

most of the time (when Sam isn't around),

I rely on my savings (hard earned from my previous job)

to purchase daily needs & baby stuff.

How many haircuts do you all have per year?

How many clothes/bags/shoes/accessories do you all buy per year?

Here's my humble account this year:

No. of Haircut: 1 (in April 08)

No. of Facial Treatment: 1

No. of new Tops (excluding nursing tops): 2

No. of Skirt: 1

No. of Pants: 0

No. of Shoes: 0 (except for 1 slipper)

No. of Facial products: 3 (cleanser, moisturizer, foundation)

No. of Bags: 0

No. of accessories (ie. hair accessories, jewellery etc.): 0

How do I spend mostly?

Daily neccessities - foodstuff, babystuff, bills

Perhaps I spend lesser since I'm home most of the time...

But not exactly as well...

when I'm out in shopping malls,

I purchase mainly baby stuff or household stuff.

& if I'm out, I've a Time Limit!

I can spend at most 2h out so that I wouldn't miss out too much of baby's schedule.

So, I would have a mental picture of what to purchase before I'm Out.

At times, I would hope to shop for stuff for myself...

Time Limit is a constraint...

& mainly, I'm more prudent in my spending -

If stuff such as clothes, bags etc. aren't really a need,

I would give up thoughts of purchasing those stuff.

Do I lack of things?

Definitely NO.

God said in Psalms 23 we shall not be lacking in want.

My mum or mil had bought me many clothes...

(though at time it may not be the design I like, it's still new clothes that I can wear afterall...

unless it's too 'off' or unfitting).

My clark shoe (that I had bought for $120 last year) is still lasting as ever.

Jian Xin has fresh supply of vegetables, poultry, fruits each week...

I Thank Lord that I managed to live by with such simplicity in my life.
No more late nights out, No partying, No Don-ning, No Shopping...
It's Much about looking after dear Jian Xin!

I imagine that if I were out, my heart & mind would be thinking about baby.

It has been a Joy looking after him.

Being with Jian Xin values much more than possessing many material stuff...

perhaps that is why I'm willing to live in contentment in simplicity.

Perhaps this is how I express Love for my child -

that is spending Time with him.

Praise Lord for his Providence of Abundance in my family.

Do you live in Contentment?

Farewell

2008-12-21T21:25:00.002+08:00

A Farewell Note to my dearest Churchmates from CBC

In my course of study/work from Social Work,

I learned that it was beneficial to bade farewell

when you depart/exit from places/designation/people.

When I departed from my workplace as a Social Worker previously,

I regretted not doing so for some of my clients

& thus not having a proper closure for both myself & the client.

I felt rather disappointed in myself whenever I thought about those clients.

So, I hope I would bade a Proper Farewell to

my Churchmates (My Family) whom I had grown up with

from aged 21 to 28 years of age.

Perhaps Song En would miss CBC more than I do

as he had been in church since baby?

Farewell CBC...

My Family will be departing to another church next year

as Song En will be serving as a preacher there in June 09.

Reality hasn't set in for me yet

as I'm still so present in CBC...

But I believe I would miss all of you when the time arrives.

Farewell Xile/Ren Ai Tuanqi...

whom I had served as a mentor of Xile from 2003 to 2007.

It was a Joy serving in youth ministry!

I truly apologise greatly for my abrupt absence after delivery of Baby.

I simply couldn't do much for all of you this year & years to come...

Sorry...& Thank YOU!

But many of you played an important part of my life -

esp. ex-leaders of Xile ('03-'07) - Joanna, Jiamin, Kai, Shuling, Andrew, Edmund, Eric

& youths like my Sec 1 class (in '07) with co-teacher, Moses

& not forgetting Alvin, sweet Anthony, Yees, Jasmine etc.

Farewell to my Peers in CBC

Xiaomin, Krystin, Shufen, Pei Xuan, Huiping, Kaiqi, Zhaoshan, Tracey,

BIL (PJE) & wife, Chuan Wen, YG, Joe, Noah, ZhiYong & wife,

Thank You for your deep, sincere friendship & prayers.

We'll remember you & do keep in touch!

Farewell to Mu Shi & Mu Shi Niang,

Meide Mu Shi & family,

& many Uncles & Aunties

who had treated us as their children in Church.

Thank you Auntie Miaoying for her love & care for our family.

We love all of you...

& will miss all of you...

I believe we'll be back to visit at times...

Probably Jian Xin would be able to walk & even run by then.

Feel free to visit us...

or if you pop by PJE's house, probably can remember us? haha.

I hope that both Song En & I had at least some pleasant/positive influence

on at least some of you as mentors previously.

Despite the different Church we'll be attending next time,

let's not look back

But,

Strive to walk firmly & bravely in our walk of Faith!

Farewell my Faithful Christian Friends from CBC!

Jian Xin's Dream Birthday Party

2008-11-30T21:40:00.000+08:00

Jian Xin's Dream Party

What would Jian Xin like for a 1st Birthday Party?

Let me think...if I were Jian Xin...

"I would love to see all my loved ones -

Mummy!, Papa!,

Po Po, Nai Nai, Ye Ye,

Shu Shu, Jiu Jiu,

& Gong Gong.

I would love to see also -

Pooh Bear, Mickey Mouse, Wombat,

Birds, Cats, Aeroplanes, Helicopters.

I would love to eat -

Sweet stuff like biscuit, cakes..."

Well...that is But a Dream Party...

because he doesn't know what is a Party

& his 1st Birthday Party

would be another party to satisfy the adults' tradition/perception of

having a 'big' celebration for a 1st Year Old.

As expected, our parents would want to invite their relatives

to witness Jian Xin's 1st Year of age.

It seems to be a gathering/meet-up session for relatives/friends as well.

Yep undeniably, birthdays are good opportunities for old time friends to meet up.

Well, I never like such big relatives gathering...

perhaps I'm more of an introvert? or perhaps I'm not close to any of my relatives?

I don't really like it but it doesn't mean I disagree to such gatherings.

It's still pretty nice to catch up with ppl you hardly see.

Well Well...

Sorry Jian Xin...

your 1st Birthday Party will be dictated by the adults.

Perhaps you might be able to indicate what you want when you're slightly older

(but well that depends on whether Papa & Mama are able to afford it as well).

How I wish I could ask relatives to dress up

in Pooh Bear/Mickey Mouse costume

so that you will be so amused to see them

rather than seeing more & much more unfamiliar faces.

How I wish I could show you little animals like the kitten, pup, birds

so that you will be delighted.

BUT nonetheless, it'll be a Joyous occasion!

Yay! I believe Jian Xin will have more toys/clothes!

Haha once again, it's Mummy, the adult who is more delighted to receive presents.

To a child,

what's most significant in his/her birthday,

isn't Gifts/Presents - toys, clothes, cakes etc.,

it's about spending that moment with him/her.

Indeed, being a Mother,

Jian Xin's Birthday 29th December 8.25pm

is a Special & Significant Date for Me.

It's the Date that God had graciously led me

in the delivery of Jian Xin.

I wish to spend this special Date with Jian Xin

as long as I live & as long as Jian Xin wants to.

His 1st Birthday Party will be on the 28th Dec (Sun) -

will be a purely relatives thingy. (as Poon's relatives consist of 40ppl already)

Thankfully, we still have 29th Dec (Mon) -

The Actual Birthday...

for Papa & Mama to celebrate with him.

Erm...maybe for breakfast, I shall make oats cereal with Banana & Yogurt,

for Lunch, cook for him Mee Sua with minced chicken, spinach & egg yolk,

& for dinner, fish fillet in sauce.

Hmm...perhaps we can have a Pooh Bear/Mickey Mouse Cake

which will be eaten by his parents eventually...

Hmm...perhaps we can go the beach/park to see the birds in the sky, the waves, the trees...

Here's Mummy Carol awaiting to Give Thanks to God

for Jian Xin's 1st Year...

2008-11-29T11:12:00.002+08:00

Jian Xin @ 11th Month (29/11/08)

with his increasing mobility,

with greater expression of his own needs,

with improving appetite for a variety of food...

New Words he can relate to:

Animals: Wombat, Penguin, Cat, Dog

Cartoon Character: Mickey Mouse, Minnie Mouse, Donald Duck, Ee-yore

Household Appliances: Aircon, Fan

Beddings: Blanket, Bolster

Objects: Pin-Wheel/Windmill, Aeroplane, Button

Words he can say:

Ma Ma & Ba Ba

Deng ('light' in Chinese)

Da, Dog, Duck, Dan Dan (most words are with a Letter 'D' in front)

New Food:

Tofu/Egg Yolk (inside porridge),

Rolled Oats Porridge/Cereal Cum Fresh Fruit (for breakfast)

Soft Wholemeal Bread (for breakfast)

Apricot

Teeth?

Lower Right is out, Upper Right is out.

Lower Left & Upper Left is sprouting out soon.

Separation Anxiety?

Jian Xin loves to be carried by loved ones only...

people whom he sees often & he feels comfortable with.

Thumbs Up for Jia En Shu Shu & Noah Bo Bo for making efforts to play with Jian Xin

...so Jian Xin enjoys playing with them.

Something Interesting About Jian Xin:

He's our dear chirpy Alarm clock that goes ringing non-stop @ 7am!

When he awakes at 7am, he'll start his chirpy & chattery self...

He'll blabber non-stop & climb up to our bed to find Mummy & Papa

& will climb onto us at times...

Usually, I'll carry him down to his bed & try to accompany him;

hoping he will sleep back so that I can sleep some more...

But well, that never happens...

So he'll continue to blabber till Mummy relents to bring him out to play.

Yep Mummy would finally relent & bring him out to play.

He'll be so hyper while Mummy is so jet-lagged.

I've bought a little trumpet for him last week...

certainly he doesn't know how to blow it yet.

But he likes Mummy to blow it for him...

so he'll pass the trumpet to Mummy to blow for him

& when Mummy blows it, he'll smile in delight.

It's amazing how Jian Xin is able to communicate his needs to Mummy using gestures right now!

Crying isn't the only form of expression already...

furthermore, Jian Xin hardly cries (unless he falls/Mummy leaves him alone)...

So by using gestures, Mummy is able to discern his needs better!

Pictures Time!!!

Jian Xin: A Keen learner...he loves to stand & dig for his toys/books from his Piglet/Pooh Box.

Jian Xin on Ikea high chair & having his meal Jian Xin toppling his box of toys as usual (JX is fortunate to have many toys passed down from Auntie Rui Zi)

Our dear Jian Xin is a little Drama Boy...

lifting his head high up & exclaiming in awe or roaring like a lion
Jian Xin standing very steadily (still with some form of support...but can stand on his own for few seconds)Jian Xin playing with the Remote Control

Jian Xin playing with Balloons for the 1st time.

Mummy playing with JX before his night bedtime

Jian Xin, the little froggy...

JX swirling the pen with his fingers

JX raising the pen up...he looks so cute in this picture...Hehe

When will Carol stop being Clumsy!

2008-11-19T20:42:00.000+08:00

Is there Anyone as Clumsy as me?

I got this terrible blue black last month

when I had a terrible fall in my house.

What Happened?

Baby woke up from his sleep & cried

so I ran from the kitchen to the room.

THUMP!

Fell @ the entrance of the room.

It was a very hard & painful fall...

& I had to grit my teeth, stand up & attend to baby who was puzzled to why I was shouting in pain...

The most silly thing was...

it was the 2nd time I fell @ the Same place.

The previous time was just 2 weeks ago.

Guess I didn't learn the lesson then

& wanted more blue blacks.

Today I'm spotted with blueblacks on my legs

which I'm clueless to how I got it...

Sadly, Baby Jian Xin is like Me...

He has blue blacks all over as well.

Two days ago, he fell 2x while crawling too quickly.

The 1st injury was a blue black on his left cheek.

The 2nd injury was a cut/slight bruise on his upper lips (probably cut by his new, sharp incisor).

He's spotted with blue blacks on his feet, thigh etc. as well.

BUT the Clumsiest Award goes to Mummy

because JX is still learning to master his gross/fine motor skills

& hence it's normal for him to have knocks & falls.

Today the Clumsiest Award Winner

actually slice a part of her last finger on her left hand

while grating the apple for baby.

Blood keep oozing out

& I was unable to point out where/how the wound was.

Wrap lots of tissue around it & place pressure onto the wound, hoping the blood would stop oozing (according to Jia En, Huifen & Sam)

Thankfully, bro-in-law & fil was around.

Jia En helped to feed baby his dinner.

Father-in-law went home to take his traditional medicine...

Blood was still oozing & dripping when he return.

FIL placed his traditional Powder onto the bloody wound.

It stings awfully at the start but got better later.

Thank Lord the blood stop oozing out after the wound was covered with the powerful Powder.

I felt rather handicapped with this rather small yet serious injury.

Thank Lord my Mil came later & helped to shower baby.

Sigh I wonder how deep is the wound?

Should be rather deep as blood kept oozing out just now.

Guess I would know it tomorrow after removing the Powder off.

I guess I would need to be less clumsy

or else I wouldn't be able to take good care of baby.

Thank Lord for the presence of my husband's family to assist me today.

Super grateful for their help!

Without their help, I wouldn't know how to stop the oozing blood

& hence wouldn't be able to take care of baby.

Guess I would have to call Sam to rush back from school to rescue me out of this situation again.

Thankfully, I didn't have to call Sam home today.

Hmm I would need to rely on my right hand for these 2days or so.

Hope my injury recovers soon.

Missing part of my life now

2008-11-12T15:52:00.001+08:00

A Missing Part...

In life, when we gain some new roles, we lose some existing roles.

When I advanced to Motherhood,

I placed down the role of a Social Worker & an active church member/mentor.

I don't miss social work as much as being an active church mentor...

sadly this is a missing part in my life right now.

I yearn to love God, to attend fellowship, to listen to sermons attentively,

to be mentor to youths, to teach in Church, to be a spiritual role model...

yet presently, I'm lacking or having none of the above.

It has always been a dilemma for me to attend fellowship at night

as Jian Xin sleeps by 8.30pm & he would get super chatty without sleep.

Hence it takes a lot of effort & energy to attend tuanqi...

I wish to listen to sermons on Sun but I need to carry a rather fidgety Jian Xin.

I miss serving in church & communicating with youths.

Yep...probably things would get better when Jian Xin becomes older as he wouldn't be too attached to me?

But most likely in 2-6 months time, I would be in another Church.

Perhaps it may be good for my low involvement in church this year...

so that I could exit quietly without affecting any group dynamics.

I doubt not many would notice our absence in church as well...

Lately, I had been confronted by Song En about my spiritual life - lacking in faith & faith in prayers...

lacking in faith that things would change with God's help.

I truly hope to improve the spiritual aspect of my life!

Sam has created a bible reading log for me, which I'm supposed to read specific chapters of the Bible daily next year...hope I'm able to persist.

May God help me to improve in my spiritual life

so that I can be a spiritual role model for Jian Xin as well.

2008-11-07T16:34:00.000+08:00

Jian Xin - a Sensitive Sleeper

I've been reading a book "Sleepless in America" lately

hoping to gain some more knowledge about helping Jian Xin sleep better.

It's a rather interesting book...

Of interest to me, having knowledge that a child's temperament may affect the child's sleep would assist me better in helping Jian Xin sleep better.

Indeed some children are born sleepers & some are not.

Jian Xin is very active, bustling with lots of energy.

If you've carried him before, you would have noticed that he would fidget lots from side to side & it's truly not easy carrying him.

(but it helps tone my arm muscles lol)

Jian Xin can be rather tense at times

or in simpler terms can be rather gan chiong.

In sum, Jian Xin is a rather sensitive sleeper & he doesn't settle himself to sleep easily due to his temperament.

So, I've to put more effort & energy into assisting him to sleep better -

providing Jian Xin with a routine, catching his window of sleep early,

giving him a quiet environment to rest, speak calmly to him etc.

May God help me.

Let's deviate...

Hmm...Jian Xin also knows what is curtain & shadow...haha.

Here's a picture of him reading a bible story book after shower.

After shower, he would be bouncing off his towel & crawling over the bed

so I would give him a book as a form of distraction so that I could dress him up.

I tried putting a hat on for Jian Xin but he disliked it...he kept removing the hat off his head...

so it wasn't easy for Sam in getting this picture.

10m, 1wk

2008-11-05T21:09:00.000+08:00

Jian Xin @ 10 months, 1 week old (313days old)

with his increasing memory capacity,

improving motor skills,

growing playfulness...

New Words he can relate to:

Winnie the Pooh/Pooh Bear/Ah Pooh,

Flower, Light, Mirror, Triangle,

Mummy & Papa Picture, Xiao Lian Dan,

Banana, Apple, Pear,

Lion, Car, Bird, Balls, Fish, Butterfly etc. etc.

Latest Motor Skills:

Jian Xin has been standing with support of furnitures/boxes...

Started cruising around on the sofa...

& even started climbing onto our bed & onto the sofa...

Started to walk around with Mummy's support.

Mealwise:

Eating 3 meals per day with mid-day snack (fruits/baby biscuit)

Mummy & Daddy has been improvising on Porridge!!!

We decided to simmer stock (fish bone/pork bone/chicken) for 2h

as it taste much nicer.

Started to dice the fruits, vegetables & meat instead of grinding it

since baby is able to chew better.

Teeth?

Yeah! Jian Xin is finally teething...Noticed the start of a tooth

on lower right on 31/10/08.

Jian Xin standing & pulling off the corner protector.

Jian Xin crawling around...

Jian Xin with a big bruise on his head...had a bad fall...

Thank Lord that he has recovered speedily!

Jian Xin with a Bib now due to much drooling as a result of teething.
Jian Xin with his dimpled smile as he plays with his grandparents.
Jian Xin enjoying a massage from Mummy...so ticklish...
Upside down!?1 of Jian Xin favorite toy: The Hangers
Jian Xin standing & looking for toys...Another favorite toy: The Laundry Basket with its holes
Jian Xin likes BOOKS..."Mirror Mirror on the Wall..." Who is that?

Anyway, we've been taking pictures for Jian Xin daily...sadly missing out on 12 days...Haha...Sam said that I've been improving in my photography skills.

Leaving...

2008-10-23T20:40:00.000+08:00

Yet Another Departure...

As we grow older, we would face with more 'departure' -

whether it is temporal or permanent.

Departing from work, departing from friendships,

departing from Church.

Hmm...Song En, Me & Baby will be departing from CBC start of next year.

We'll be serving in another Church.

Reason: CBC won't be employing another pastor

A totally new environment brings much apprehension in me.

New place, New members...

I will miss CBC & family very much.

I'm also totally clueless about how to be of help as a to-be-Preacher's Wife???

May God help me to grow spiritually.

Christian Readers, please pray for us...that God'll grant us lots of widsom to know how to serve in this church. May God use our family for the glory of His Kingdom. May I be a good support to Song En.

Jian Xin at 9m2wk

2008-10-17T21:46:00.000+08:00

Jian Xin @ 9mths 2 wks old - His Different ExpressionsHello Everyone...How've you been? Wow it's been about 3wks since I've blogged. Guess I've been busy improvising on Porridge & ermm...playing Word Challenge with Sam at nights.

Baby Jian Xin has grown tremendously!!! He looks more like a boy toddler than a baby right now. He's so much more mobile, expressive, playful, cheeky, affectionate, chatty etc. He crawls to different places at a quick rate now (in particular, crawling to the kitchen to find Mummy). He also likes to stand with the support of furniture. He demonstrates great memory - he will look at the objects/things we say to him (eg. moon, Mr. Bean Car, Flower, Wo Wo, Pig, Cars, Birds etc.). He has learnt to clap his hands & wave though he seldom does it yet. He would bounce his body according to rhythm of songs he likes.

As for Mummy Carol, I've been enjoying improvising on Baby's Porridge. Yay! I've improved in my porridge - right texture. Haha. Now for Lunch & Dinner, I'll cook Brown Rice + Meat/Fish + a Green Vege (Spinach/Broccoli/Cauliflower/Pea) + a Orange Vege (Carrot/Sweet Potato/Pumpkin) in Different stock (vege stock/chicken stock/fish stock/beef stock. It's really been fun cooking for Baby... perhaps he's the first person who would eat the food I cook daily without complaining. Yay! He has started eating more porridge as well. As he still doesn't have a tooth yet, guess it'll be porridge for now. It has been rather Enjoyable looking after Jian Xin despite of the weariness. Thank Lord.

Here are the Pictures of Jian Xin in his Different EXPRESSIONS:

Pulling Winnie's Eyes

Bu Shuang Face

I'm Cool...

Gazing at the TVSmiling after showerJX playing toys while having his meals.

JX playing with his Favorite Sunflower
"Help Me Out!" - JX in a Piglet Box "Hello..." JX giving a shy Smile to my Brother (JX often burrows his head to my neck & give a shy smile to unfamiliar faces these days...so cute)
Pear Pear...
"OH..." (Lately, JX loves seeing shadows & catching them)

Auntie Dian...a friend...

2008-09-27T21:23:00.000+08:00

Auntie Dian...a friend.

The arrival of baby Jian Xin has brought closer my relationships with many -

my mum, my brother, my in-laws

& Auntie Dian.

As Auntie Dian will be returning Home next week (after 5 years of diligent service),

this post will be dedicated to her.

My previous impression of Dian (before the birth of Jian Xin)

was that she was diligent & cheerful.

If you look at the clothes/bedsheets etc. that she has pressed,

you will be amazed at the Perfection she placed into ironing!

With the arrival of Baby Jian Xin,

our households appear to bustle with more life & activity...

Indeed it's rather amazing how the arrival of little baby

could somehow affect the surroundings/atmosphere.

We await in excitement upon seeing Baby's face & laughter.

My parents, my in-laws, Sam's grandparents await in excitement & cheer

to see Baby...

certainly not missing out Auntie Dian as well!

Hehe...Auntie Dian never fails to smile when she sees Baby!

She is always so lively whenever she plays with Baby...

which I wish I could be as well.

she comes up with creative ways to play with Baby -

hiding, placing toys on top of pillow & letting them fall like Humpty Dumpty,

stacking toys at a distance so that Baby could learn to crawl etc.

She is always chatty & interactive whenever she's with baby -

so Baby feels very happy & comfortable with her.

She is a great helper - in playing with baby, in feeding of meals, in bathing etc.

As Baby has bonded with her rather excellently...

so I could take a short break whenever Auntie Dian is around which I'm very thankful for.

Presently, Baby recognises Auntie Dian when she calls his name

& would squeal & bounce in delight when she plays with him at the doorstep.

I believe Auntie Dian would miss greatly -

Ah Gong, Ah Po & Baby.

Hmm she'll miss Baby - won't be able to see baby's 1st tooth,

baby's first stand, baby's first wave & clap...

unless Baby learns to wave/clap by next week.

Hmm...Baby will miss Auntie Dian as well.

Next time I shall share with baby about this Auntie who has brought much cheer to his life as a baby.

So will I miss Auntie Dian - a friend.

She has such a positive outlook towards life & matters

that I could model from...

Thank you for teaching me to cook my 1st porridge!

Thank you for cooking delicious meals for US!

Thank you for your diligence & efforts!

Thank you for putting Perfection to the work you do!

Thank you for your tolerance/accomodation when we fail to notify you not to come.

Thank you for sharing the joyful moments of baby's growing milestones!

Thank you for kindly helping to look after baby so that I can rest at times!

Thank you for chatting with me about TV shows - Zhu Meng, Korean Vietnamese Wife...

Thank you for being NOT less than a Friend!

Hmm will truly miss your lively presence around!

Nonetheless, I feel Happy that you will be returning home to pursue

your happiness - new family, new career etc.

May you have a blissful marriage!

May you continue to pursue your love for cooking!

Keep in touch through emails!

May you come to know the Lord...

Farewell for now...

2008-09-18T20:20:00.000+08:00

Feeling Joyful In the Midst of Weariness

Since the birth of baby, I haven't slept for an interval of 4 hours or more.

As baby hasn't learn to sleep through the night,

he has been waking between 1-3hrs during his sleep in the middle of the night.

I'm trying my very best to remediate this problem (reading books, setting routine, letting baby sleep on his own when he's wake etc.)

because I'm worried that it would affect baby's sleep &

I'm truly exhausted most of the time.

I shall skip the details of what I had done to remediate the problem

since some readers wouldn't be able to understand issues such as breastfeeding etc.

Due to the insufficient sleep I've, I can become rather grumpy & grouchy in the middle of the night...which can be rather negative for both Sam & baby.

In addition to the lack of rest, a new busy day awaits me the next morning -

Preparing baby's meals, Household chores, Finding new games for baby etc.

A Stay-at-Home Mum is not so free as most people would think!

I've been very busy especially when baby has started taking solid meals & started to crawl.

In the midst of much weariness & busy-ness,

it can be very difficult to experience Joy.

I find myself hoping to 'pass' each day with a routine...

BUT...

God has given me such a Good Company to pass each day.

This good company is none other than my Adorable Baby Jian Xin!

I believe God probably has a good intentions when he creates Babies to be so cute & adorable.

Hence, in the midst of much weariness & busy-ness,

I'm still able to find simple joys in being a Stay-Home Mum.

These Simple Joys...

Each morning, Jian Xin wakes up chattering to himself &

looks for Papa & Mama with those bright beeming eyes.

When I'm out of sight, he'll call "Ma".

He'll listen intently when I read his favorite story - "Little Lamb's Big Scare"...

even though I've read & repeated the story umpteen times,

Baby would still be delighted/amused when I call out "Where are you little Lamb?"

Certainly, I've made variations - different language, tones etc.

so that I won't bore baby. Haha.

Today he's able to look into the direction of 'banana' & 'flower' when I asked him where is it. So smart of him.

Baby has been able indicate to us that he wants to drink water too.

He'll make "Urr-Urr" sounds & bounce when I bring him his cup.

Lately, Baby would bend his head low & give a sweet, shy smile

when he sees unfamiliar faces.

When baby is sleepy, he would snuggle into my body.

Baby is also an expert in making sounds -

blowing bubbles, car tyre screech, grrr, trk...

Wow that's quite a lot isn't it?!

Yep, Thank You God for Baby...

in the midst of weariness & busy-ness,

may I learn to lean on God for joy, strength, ability & wisdom to look after baby!